barkybeak

joined 3 weeks ago
[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 hour ago

There are many examples of people crashing out based on popular police cam channels

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 hour ago

My kids call me old fashion because I listen to 90s - mid 2000s music exclusively.

My kids listen to newer music (I don’t know the bands) but I show them the impact of 90s and 2000s music had on the industry.

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 33 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Everyone when they listen to “Semi-Charmed Life”

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 2 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Water from the hose is full of nano bots bioengineered to track your whereabouts.

That’s why I only drink the finest of bottled water

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 39 points 21 hours ago (3 children)

Oh man. This brings back so much trauma.

Holding the flashlight for your parents is one of the hardest things to do.

I have asked my son to hold a flashlight for me. I understand what my parents went through.

However when my buddy holds a flashlight, he does a good job.

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 9 points 21 hours ago (6 children)

Fiji has that special water bottle with the special labeling. Even if it is “just water”, the packaging makes it look expensive compared to the other waters on the shelf.

I remember in high school people would buy the Fiji water bottles and fill them with regular water. It was a status symbol.

Voss does the exact same thing with their glass bottles.

Evian is the “middle class” of the water world.

 

My wife and I use cannabis because of health and mental practices.

We are getting bored with our current routine. We watch tv shows or movies, we listen to music, we engage in brain rot. Stuff like that.

What are your suggestions? We like calm vibes.

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 9 points 1 day ago (17 children)

I would go to the high seas but I don’t know where to start. I used to visit the high seas often about 10 years ago. But now. Shrugs shoulders.

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 day ago

iPhone. Don’t know the model number but it has four cameras and is huge.

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 26 points 2 days ago (15 children)

Specific theologies believe dinosaur bones were planted in the earth by satan to affront God.

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 23 points 4 days ago (2 children)

David Blaine Street Magic with Mikey Day

[–] barkybeak@lemmy.zip 53 points 5 days ago (4 children)

No matter what, under no circumstances should you ever believe the company or place you work for will back you up.

If a company was placed in a situation where they can get rid of you for any reason, they will and they will do it as fast as possible.

Even if you believe you are irreplaceable, a company will spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to get you out of the equation.

Even if you have been with the company for 20+ years, if the company sees a way to save a hundred bucks by getting rid of you, they will.

Even if you and your boss and their bosses are buddy buddy and they are the godparent to your child and if you donated them a kidney, they will replace you.

Even if you show that you work the most, bring in the most sales, work the longest, get paid the least, and do work so everyone can slack off, they will replace you.

Also HR is never there for you. It is there to protect the company first and foremost. If you go to them for any reason, you are on a list to be the first to go.

 

I’ve been waiting two weeks for an Excel file I need for a mid-month report. The one person who can generate it is buried, so fair enough. It used to take him an hour. Now, with our carefully monitored AI “efficiency,” it takes about six days.

It finally arrives—fully merged and centered like it’s trying to win a design award. Undoing that one cell at a time is now my personality.

Meanwhile, I’m no longer allowed to use VBA, so I asked AI for an alternative. It suggested… VBA. I tried its version anyway. It converted everything into a table with hard-coded colors, so now adding a row requires manual painting. A bold step backward.

I would fix it properly, but the shade of blue must be exact or we trigger a departmental post-mortem on “lessons learned.” No one knows what the hex code means, but we respect it deeply.

At some point, I ask a coworker a question. He answers in 30 seconds, clearly, and wishes me a nice day. A glimpse of civilization.

Now my work is somewhere between my boss, her boss, and a VP who reports to the CEO. I’m waiting on feedback for something that used to take an hour and now takes a week.

Looking forward to next month.

 

You open a program for work… and suddenly it doesn’t work.

So you tell your supervisor.

They tell you to call the help desk.

You call the help desk… they can’t help.

They tell you to submit a ticket.

You go to submit a ticket… but first you have to create an account.

To create the account, you have to link your work ID.

To link your work ID, you need your phone for a code.

Then it makes you create a new password (not your usual one, obviously).

Then you have to verify your email.

You wait… finally get it… click the link…

…and it makes you log in again.

And grab your phone again. Another code.

Finally—you’re in.

Now you fill out the ticket, using that random username you were given on day one and told never to lose.

You submit it.

It says: “Pending supervisor approval.”

Your supervisor calls:

“Why did you submit this?”

So now you explain everything…

and walk them through it… step by step… because they don’t understand any of it.

They approve it.

You get an email:

“This will take up to 4 days.”

You need it done tomorrow.

So now you ask who to escalate to.

Your supervisor asks their boss.

Their boss asks someone else.

Eventually, a VP gets involved.

They tell you to contact a guy—Mr. Patel.

You call Mr. Patel.

He asks a million questions.

Eventually he realizes:

“This broke after a Windows update.”

So now he has to talk to his boss.

Meanwhile, your boss keeps asking:

“What’s taking so long?”

You explain… again.

You go to lunch.

Come back—Mr. Patel messaged you 5 minutes after you left:

“Call me.”

You call him. Voicemail.

He calls you back an hour later (because he was “in a meeting”).

He says:

“You need a new computer. That’ll take 5 days.”

Your boss’s boss is now on your case because only you can do this one task.

You ask if there’s another way.

“No.”

Now your supervisor tells their boss, who tells their boss…

and suddenly the VP calls you directly.

You explain everything again (for the 4th time).

He makes one phone call.

Suddenly—you have admin access.

You fix the issue in 5 minutes.

It’s now 6 PM.

You spent all day waiting, escalating, and explaining…

…and the thing you fixed?

Didn’t even matter—because the other team never showed up anyway.

 

You open a program for work… and suddenly it doesn’t work.

So you tell your supervisor.

They tell you to call the help desk.

You call the help desk… they can’t help.

They tell you to submit a ticket.

You go to submit a ticket… but first you have to create an account.

To create the account, you have to link your work ID.

To link your work ID, you need your phone for a code.

Then it makes you create a new password (not your usual one, obviously).

Then you have to verify your email.

You wait… finally get it… click the link…

…and it makes you log in again.

And grab your phone again. Another code.

Finally—you’re in.

Now you fill out the ticket, using that random username you were given on day one and told never to lose.

You submit it.

It says: “Pending supervisor approval.”

Your supervisor calls:

“Why did you submit this?”

So now you explain everything…

and walk them through it… step by step… because they don’t understand any of it.

They approve it.

You get an email:

“This will take up to 4 days.”

You need it done tomorrow.

So now you ask who to escalate to.

Your supervisor asks their boss.

Their boss asks someone else.

Eventually, a VP gets involved.

They tell you to contact a guy—Mr. Patel.

You call Mr. Patel.

He asks a million questions.

Eventually he realizes:

“This broke after a Windows update.”

So now he has to talk to his boss.

Meanwhile, your boss keeps asking:

“What’s taking so long?”

You explain… again.

You go to lunch.

Come back—Mr. Patel messaged you 5 minutes after you left:

“Call me.”

You call him. Voicemail.

He calls you back an hour later (because he was “in a meeting”).

He says:

“You need a new computer. That’ll take 5 days.”

Your boss’s boss is now on your case because only you can do this one task.

You ask if there’s another way.

“No.”

Now your supervisor tells their boss, who tells their boss…

and suddenly the VP calls you directly.

You explain everything again (for the 4th time).

He makes one phone call.

Suddenly—you have admin access.

You fix the issue in 5 minutes.

It’s now 6 PM.

You spent all day waiting, escalating, and explaining…

…and the thing you fixed?

Didn’t even matter—because the other team never showed up anyway.

![](https://lemmy.zip/pictrs/image/e8155aa3-fd43-44fd-9544-e9226295ccf7.avi

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