this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2026
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Political Memes

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[–] TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today 59 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Oof, I knew they found him unresponsive. I did not know they had to do CPR. I would be surprised if he was still alive, and there's virtually no chance he will recover. CPR done outside a hospital setting on patients 80 or above only has like a 2-10% chance of ever being discharged, lower if they have pre-existing conditions.

I wouldn't want to do the compressions for that. I bet it felt like breaking a glass xylophone in an old burlap sack.

[–] lukaro@lemmy.zip 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I would have done CPR so hard on him...

A good Samaritan right here.

I would want to

Just so I could push his xyphoid process well and truly into his liver while mushing the shards of ribs into his putrid lungs

[–] green_goglin@thelemmy.club 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] bampop@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I'm looking forward to a series of posts where he has this same pose and signs of decomposition gradually set in

[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Impossible to fake, must be true then. The internet has never lied.

[–] green_goglin@thelemmy.club 3 points 1 day ago

Fact check: TRUE