this post was submitted on 08 May 2025
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chapotraphouse

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[–] Utter_Karate@hexbear.net 31 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Driving around in his popemobile, the fumes from his special consecrated gasoline venting directly into the sealed driver's compartment, with four Swiss guards in there with him firing their weapons full auto into the bulletproof roof at all times. Weeks of eating nothing but communion wafers, no sleep ever. He pulls up to the White House at 200 mph and slams the door open. The Swiss guard, still bleeding from their ears and crazed with gasoline fumes, gunpowder smoke and special papal blessings launch out of the car like racing hounds, the pope following at a full sprint. It's time for JD Vance to meet the new pope.

[–] Des@hexbear.net 7 points 1 day ago

The final scene from A24 presents Civil War but with this instead

[–] carpoftruth@hexbear.net 27 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

nice one, i'm going to pretend this is my joke in other internet communities. thanks for making me funny hexbear

order-of-lenin

[–] blunder@hexbear.net 14 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)
[–] Xenomorph@hexbear.net 17 points 1 day ago

Go with christ my child garcia-cock-shotty

[–] buh@hexbear.net 10 points 1 day ago

he's gonna remind everyone why the tommy gun is called a chicago typewriter