I think the general consensus for homelabbers is a mesh network -- Tailscale and Netbird are the two most popular options
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VPN is the way to go if you're not sharing it with a bunch of people
Unless you live a very dynamic lifestyle that requires your calendar to be 24/7 synced, you can just use whatever server software you like, make it listen in LAN only, and have your devices sync when they're at home.
DecSyncCC and Syncthing is another option.
Late response. I used to host radicale, but switched to MyPhoneExplorer a few years ago. I just sync from the laptop to the phone over bluetooth. It does contacts and memos as well. Reminds me of the old Palm Desktop sync.
Radicale is the GOAT and supports authentication. Or you can just run it on a LAN behind a firewall.
Who do you want to have access to said calendar?
Just myself, but I would like to keep it synced between my phone and my laptop while also keeping a backup.
Then you should really look into setting up a personal VPN. After that what you use to do calendar becomes irrelevant in terms of access.