this post was submitted on 07 May 2026
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I'm a healthy outdoorsy athletic woman, never touched drugs or alcohol or junk food, a lifestyle which is intentional & ESSENTIAL criteria I work hard for.

So WHY the only men who approach me with amorous intentions are unhealthy, cigarette, alcohol, junk food men??

Update: Thank you for your thoughtful responses & the humorous ones too. I upvoted my favorites & laughed at the funnies and you've given me plenty to think about & work on.

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[–] zoloftt@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

I think it's ok for women to be allowed to ask men or at the gym purely based on the reason why it's not ok for men to ask.

An estimated 91% of victims of rape & sexual assault are female and 9% male. Nearly 99% of perpetrators are male. (1) This US Dept. of Justice statistic does not report those who do not identify in these gender boxes.

https://www.humboldt.edu/supporting-survivors/educational-resources/statistics

Men commit the preponderance of sexual violence/harassment by a long shot.

It's become the norm for men to leave women alone in less-than-social spaces because it provides a more welcoming environment. Which is a huge cultural improvement IMO. The other way around though is fine. I don't think most men are expecting to be sexually harassed/abused by women in those same spaces.

Not saying it couldn't happen, because it does, but it's SOOOOO MUCH less likely.