this post was submitted on 29 Apr 2025
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Don't be mean. I promise to do my best to judge that fairly.
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Yeah, dude doesn't really bother me, but the others, as well as "guys," do. Bro has a natural feminine version: "sis." So does man: "woman" or "girl." Likewise for guys: "gals" or "girls." Making them gender neutral just causes confusion IMO, we should instead just use different terms w/o any gender association, such as "fellow," "friend," "home slice/skillet" (the 90s kid in me really wants that to come back), or the others you mentioned.
But yeah, dude is totally fine as a gender-neutral term due to surfer culture taking it over. But the others are a lot harder sell for me.
But yes, be excellent to each other. If your female friend wants to be called "bro," go nuts.
Not to poke, but the other day at work I walked up to a group of women and just casually said, "hey guys" without even thinking about it. The reaction was absent. It was just a simple response back, "hey how's it going?"
After I said it, I was like in my own head, "huh, that was odd."
Sorry for the mostly tangent, but I guess I’m also more sensitive about terms than I realized.
My sister got married after dating her husband for about six months. On the day of the wedding, my new BIL started calling me “sis” even though it was the third time we’d met.
I actually like him quite a lot now and I’m very glad that they’re married, but woof did that rub me the wrong way. I don’t think anyone has ever called me sis before or since with the exception of drunk women in the bathroom (and I have, all told, eight siblings, step siblings, and siblings in law).