Positive leftist news on youtube can be good but it's no solution to what you are dealing with. Genuinely take the advice of other users. Log off, read books about things you like that aren't existentially dreadful, find a place you like that is outside and spend time there, share quality time with people you love, cook a tasty meal you don't get to have often, create art if you are in to that.
It is good to be political involved and politically aware but the human mind has limits. You aren't evil or failing your comrades for saving some of your energy for yourself. You're a better comrade when you are a healthy comrade.