this post was submitted on 02 Dec 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] RedSnt@feddit.dk 20 points 1 day ago

This reads like a classic LinkedinLunatics post and I love it. Great parody!

[–] tino@lemmy.world 46 points 2 days ago

We're missing the most important rule here. Did the nephew open a ticket?

[–] Redredme@lemmy.world 69 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Guest vlan? Smart.

Blocking 80/443 knowing all to well everything depends on those: evil.

Throttling to 56k: the original original poster just being a dick.

Took 45 minutes: Maybe find another job. You're not good at it.

Conclusion: The sister was right. Evil incompetent dick.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 29 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Took 45 minutes: Maybe find another job. You’re not good at it.

Bit harsh.

The OpenWRT guest wifi guide isn't a simple switch like you would get on your OEM router, but involves manually setting up a bridge device, a new firewall zone, and a new AP on one of your radios.

This can take some time if you want to do things the right way. 10 minutes to setup with no extra config steps. Add another 10 if you need to move around your firewall rules, and another 20 for random debugging.

https://openwrt.org/docs/guide-user/network/wifi/guestwifi/configuration_webinterface

Although, you set it up once. After that it's just a checkbox.

[–] nibbler@discuss.tchncs.de 24 points 2 days ago (1 children)

and of course you need to tag the new network on all your switches, routers, APs... not to forget testing and integration in your monitoring system. 45 minutes is absolutely fine.

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[–] andioop@programming.dev 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I have a feeling this is satire, and I'm usually the type of person to miss the joke and think it's genuine

[–] Honytawk@feddit.nl 2 points 1 day ago

Even if it is satire, doesn't mean we can do a full breakdown, especially for comedic value.

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[–] termaxima@slrpnk.net 255 points 2 days ago (2 children)

The real question is : Why did you invite anyone over, before having a guest VLAN set up ? Classic beginner mistake.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 77 points 2 days ago (5 children)

I have two seperate guest VLANs, one for my family, and one for the people I love.

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[–] squaresinger@lemmy.world 17 points 2 days ago

Sounds like the network people at my company. They are asking us to spend more time in the office, but they don't provide enough desks, they don't provide working wired LAN and they only provide semi-working Wifi. All with proxies that don't work and filters that don't let me access the webapp I am supposed to maintain, which is blocked for "being a commercial website". Thanks, I know, I have to program that crap.

[–] Bosht@lemmy.world 26 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I legitimately can't tell if this is a joke or some dude trying to do a humble brag post on LinkedIn. So many 'look what I can do' posts on that damn site.

[–] FunkFactory@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago

No one that serious about network security wouldn't already have a network dedicated to untrusted devices relatives could use. Definite joke, still entertaining 😂

[–] Sunsofold@lemmings.world 4 points 1 day ago

LinkedIn is Poe's Law for corporatism made into a lifestyle.

[–] northendtrooper@lemmy.ca 374 points 3 days ago

Guys a madman, didn't even ask for a ticket.

[–] apotheotic@beehaw.org 263 points 3 days ago (16 children)

Allowing children on roblox is negligence at this point so I think this is unironically in the right

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 176 points 3 days ago (7 children)

Deleting Roblox and installing Factorio

You'll thank me when you're older, kid.

[–] bazus1@lemmy.world 75 points 3 days ago (3 children)
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[–] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 175 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (37 children)

I've only ever met two types of IT professional. Either:

  • Their home network is immaculate and smooth as butter. It connects quickly and integrates with everything. They can manage it all from their phone, but they don't have to because it's all automated. Their server room (a) exists and (b) is cable managed. There's a wireless access point and connected smart speaker in every room, including the garage and the back patio, but they're carefully located for maximum sound coverage and to prevent signal interference. Their home theater is substantially better than a movie theater, and their media server is packed to the gills with content. Network security is hardened, with bespoke subnets for every user and tunneling for the media server and smart home functions. You feel a sense of calm and ease when connected to their network. "Everything I do at work, I try out at home first."

Or:

  • Their "home network" is a single Belkin router from 2011. They've had it since college, and it takes 9 minutes to reboot (which they have to do daily). It doesn't even have Tomato on it and still uses the default password. They still watch OTA TV and Blu-Rays, so the wifi is exclusively connected to the smart switch that their tea kettle is plugged into so they can start their hot water before they come downstairs. You feel guilty even asking for the wifi password. "Why would I do any network stuff here? I do IT all day at work, the last thing I want to do is even touch a Cat5 cable at home."
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[–] xxce2AAb@feddit.dk 169 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"Are you nuts kid? We don't use wifi around here. I unsoldered the antennas of my router, just in case."

[–] Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone 81 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Fake! The AP is separate from the router!

[–] bisby@lemmy.world 66 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Imagine having a router with an AP built in. We don't use that consumer tier stuff around here. 😎

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[–] W3dd1e@lemmy.zip 122 points 3 days ago (28 children)

I’m very against Roblox. I know a kid who had a really hard time with online predators and a lot of it stated with Roblox. He’s 19 now. He and I were talking about it recently.

Parents think Roblox is like Minecraft bc of the aesthetics of the game. But, Roblox is not a game with a chat feature, it’s a chat room with some games. That’s a big difference.

They have 380 million users. Around 60% of the user base is under the age of 16. 40% is under the age of 12. That’s 152 million mostly unmonitored kids.

I’m sure Roblox has gotten better moderation during that time, but in our experience predators meet kids on Roblox and get them to exchange Discord or other contact info with them.

Discord is also a problem here, but that’s for another rant in another thread. If you are concerned about your kids and want to discuss it with me, feel free to message me.

TLDR: DO NOT LET YOUR KIDS PLAY ROBLOX unless you are actively monitoring the game.

[–] Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca 95 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I’m sure Roblox has gotten better moderation during that time

Quite the opposite.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roblox%E2%80%93Schlep_controversy

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[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 67 points 2 days ago (1 children)

45 minutes setting up an alt vlan?

Was he getting paid by the hour?

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 40 points 2 days ago (4 children)

The experience of managing a consumer-grade LAN appliance:

Open web browser

Start typing 192.168.0.1

It auto-inserts 192.168.0.12 because that's the IP address of your NAS, and you've logged into it to adjust something at some point in the last six months. You register it has done this as you're releasing the Enter key.

click Back.

Type the IP address again, this time carefully deleting the 2 it oh so helpfully inserted.

Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck. It loads to a completely useless stats page that has no information that anyone has ever needed to know.

Click LAN Setup.

Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck.

Parse the wall of acronyms before you, click the link that says DHCP.

Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck.

It continues in that fashion until you get what you need done or your network stops working and you have to get a pen and press the Reset button on the back of the device.

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[–] bizarroland@lemmy.world 66 points 2 days ago (2 children)

What idiot IT specialist does not run a segregated VLAN for guest wifi access? That is just rude.

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[–] Sergio@lemmy.world 113 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Simple solution: log the kid into your neighbor's wifi.

[–] SSUPII@sopuli.xyz 94 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (15 children)

As an early teen my parents turned off the WiFi router at night and when not in use. I eventually found the neighbor had an exploitable WEP router from an Android app, and I used it to continue watching Minecraft and Happy Wheels videos on Youtube.

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[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 48 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Lol wtf? Why even spend 45 minutes doing that if you're going to completely block those ports?

Just tell him "no".

[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 26 points 2 days ago

"oh I'm trying to fix it just give me a few more minutes away from everyone" lights joint

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[–] lorski@sopuli.xyz 25 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Kid should be learning social skills at a family party.

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[–] pewpew@feddit.it 59 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Ok but 56kbps is just evil

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[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 2 days ago

I'll admit it. I can feel that vibe and I don't totally disagree.

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