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Lee's reputation as an honorable man is something of a fabrication by false lost cause narratives.
The reality is that his reputation and skill as a military leader was overblown, and he was as cruel an enslaver as they come. He felt slavery was a cause worth fighting for, all to protect his/his family's wealth. If he chose to fight for the south in spite of low odds of winning, it's only more indicative of just how strongly he supported the confederacy and the right to own people.
The notion that he only acted out of loyalty to his home state is the work of lost causers trying absolve him of responsibility for betraying his country. This way, he can continue filling the role of (white) people's hero long after his death and get monuments built for him that celebrate and perpetuate confederate ideals. If Lee's decision was normal, one might ask why General George Henry Thomas, another Virginian, still chose to fight for the United States alongside 100,000 other southern unionists who disagreed with secession.