this post was submitted on 12 Jul 2025
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Explain Like I'm Five

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This story seems to have faded in the wake of events ad nauseam. We are all aware of Senor Luigi. However, most folks can’t recall the full name of the guy that allegedly Luigi gunned down. Mission accomplished.

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[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 31 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (5 children)

I think the guy he allegedly killed, had a name that started with.... I think it was a d? David? Derek? Dddddouchebag. Douchebag, yeah. I think the person that died was a massive douchebag.

That seems right to me ....

[–] mambabasa@slrpnk.net 44 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Luigi didn't do it though. He's being set up by the prosecution.

[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I know, I was certainly spending time with him during the alleged attack. He couldn't have done it while sat across from me at that diner, many miles away from where the crime happened.

[–] Forester@pawb.social 1 points 17 hours ago (1 children)
[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 3 points 16 hours ago

You're thinking of dinner. A diner is a place that serves food.

[–] ipitco@lemmybefree.net -5 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago) (1 children)

Source? It sounds like a conspiracy theory based on nothing

What indicates that would be the case?

[–] TherapyGary@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 21 hours ago (2 children)

There was no murderer. He died of natural causes

[–] irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 21 hours ago

After all, shootings are just a natural part of life.

[–] 6stringringer@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 day ago

Did someone light a match? Is he being cremated?

[–] devAlot@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I think the guy he killed

Allegedly 😉

[–] misteloct@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Downvoted only for the winky face. I earnestly believe the guy is innocent and unrelated

[–] devAlot@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago

Oh shit same here, the winky face wasn't meant to imply otherwise. Was more like "hey now, let's be clear on what's what"

[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 day ago

Oh right, let me correct my wording.

Thanks.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago
[–] Rakonat@lemmy.world -1 points 1 day ago

I'm pretty sure it was Bob. Or Brad. Billy? removedass! Yes it was definitely removedass.