Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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That makes sense. When I first transitioned I was pretty sure I wouldn't get a vaginoplasty, I could settle and live without that - I knew I needed to get an orchiectomy though. I ended up getting both - I got an orchi first and it was very much worth it. Either way, my point is that things can change quickly, I used to be extremely jealous of anyone who could pass as woman-shaped ... now I pass all the time, well beyond what I thought was possible.
Transition is hard everywhere, but as far as I understand it, the challenges in Germany are similar to other places in Europe in terms of very long wait times for heavily gatekept public services. On the other side, at least there are public services accessible for people who otherwise would never afford it, and in the meantime DIY HRT is a possibility.
I'm in the U.S. and the situation here is both worse and better in some ways. I happened to get a good enough insurance plan to cover my vaginoplasty, and had the resources to cover other expenses. Most trans folks don't have that kind of financial situation, and even people privileged enough to have insurance are often denied gender affirming care (I actually was at first too, I had to change insurance entirely when I transitioned). Even with that situation, I still had to face gatekeeping: no gender-affirming procedures would be covered by insurance unless I had been on supervised HRT for at least one year. I also had to get multiple letters from psychologists, one of which had to be "independent" (in my case my hospital had a psychiatric unit that was able to serve this purpose).
Because it's private healthcare in the U.S., the wait times are much better than Europe's public options (more like 6 - 12 months rather than 5 - 10 years).
Honestly, you might look at saving money and trying to go to Thailand for vaginoplasty, that might be the realistic alternative to the public option if that's ever a financial possibility.
Either way, just keep working towards your goals steadily - you might be surprised where you end up. :-)