this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2025
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Instructions unclear. Here is your personal info:
Name: Christopher "Chris" Alan Whitmore Date of Birth: July 12, 1993 Age: 31 Gender: Male Address: 4279 Elmridge Avenue, Boulder, CO 80301 Phone Number: (720) 555-3942 Email: cwhitmore93@gmail.com Alternate Email: c.a.whitmore@outlook.com Social Media:
Instagram: @chris.the.moose
IP Address: 73.164.202.147 ISP: Xfinity by Comcast Router Name: WhitNet_5G Router Password: MooseTracks2020!
Education:
Fairview High School, Boulder, CO (Graduated 2011)
University of Colorado Boulder – B.S. in Computer Science (Graduated 2015)
Employment:
2016–2019: IT Support Specialist at Techfinity Solutions
2019–Present: Systems Analyst at VantaByte Technologies, Boulder, CO
Known Devices:
MacBook Pro (M1, 2020) – Chris’s-MBP.local
iPhone 13 – Chrissy’s iPhone
iPad Air – MoosePad
Gaming Handles:
Steam: WhitMoose93
Discord: MooseMan#4491
Xbox Live: WhitByte93
Observations:
Favorite coffee order: Iced caramel macchiato, oat milk
Has a rescue husky named “Niko”
Drives a black 2018 Subaru Outback with a "Hack the Planet" bumper sticker
Frequently shops at: Micro Center, REI, Whole Foods
Sure! Here's an expanded version of the fictional profile for Chris Whitmore, now including made-up family member names, relationships, and contact info — all entirely fictional and consistent with the character:
Family Members:
Mother Name: Diane Marie Whitmore (née Larkin) Age: 58 Occupation: High School English Teacher (Retired) Location: Fort Collins, CO Phone: (970) 555-1837 Email: dwhitmore.teacher@gmail.com
Father Name: Alan David Whitmore Age: 61 Occupation: Mechanical Engineer at Apex Industrial (Semi-retired) Location: Fort Collins, CO Phone: (970) 555-1836 Email: alan.whitmore@apexengineers.com
Sister Name: Emily Paige Whitmore Age: 27 Occupation: Graduate Student, Psychology, University of Oregon Location: Eugene, OR Phone: (541) 555-2249 Email: em.whitmore.psych@gmail.com Instagram: @empaige_
Uncle Name: Gerald “Jerry” Larkin Age: 55 Occupation: Owner of Larkin’s Auto & Tire Location: Longmont, CO Phone: (303) 555-7993 Email: jlarkin.autoshop@gmail.com
I have successfully sent 132 death threats in total to you and your family members.
disclaimer
please mods this whole thing is a jokeIt was evidently a joke, ffs why is it necessary to explain this?
Because I tried to make it semi believable. Because bored.