ADHD

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I can't stop when its time to stop (lemmy.today)

submitted 2 days ago by Remy@lemmy.today to c/adhd@lemmy.world

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Hello, I have a big problem that interferes with every aspect of my life. And I want to ask you all if you experience this too and/or you have any ideas on how to improve this behavior?

The Problem

When I do anything interesting, or anything that just isn't completely boring, I can't stop when it's time to stop and start the doing the next thing. I always think, something like "Just five minutes more" and then I sometimes finish hours later than I had planned. This breaks all time-sensitive plans and also causes me to go to sleep far too late.

I don't think that its simple procrastination, because what I feel when I do it, is not about not wanting to start the next thing, but about not wanting to stop the current thing.

List of things I already do / have already tried

Setting up alarms that remind me that I need to stop doing the current thing and start doing the next thing
Creating schedules
Configuring the Wifi Router to turn of at certain times: This is very effective (when I have taken out my SIM card before), but its only helping with cutting the wifi at the end of the day for bedtime, not other time sensitive tasks that are necessary to even enable me to sleep on time (like eating dinner early enough)
Buffer time: Most of the time I can't get my self to view the buffer deadline as the actual deadline
Reading books about habits: I read some books about habits, but these books are mostly about starting an activity, or don't starting an activity at all, but I need to do certain things, and stop doing them on time.
This list is probably incomplete

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[–] Remy@lemmy.today 1 points 14 hours ago

Thank you for replying

"When I realise that I should stop, instead set a 5 or 10 minute timer and stop when it goes off." The problem is that I press the snooze again and again, sometimes for over an hour.

"Start an inner dialogue, e. g. like: “What do I gain from this? Why am I doing this?” Don’t consider it implicit pressure to stop, just an open, honest dialogue. The goal is not to stop right away, but to keep learning about yourself for a couple of weeks while you still do it. But for some people, they feel caught by themselves in the action and might stop right away; that is also okay." I think this would work, but you do I get my self to start the dialogue in this moments? These situation that I don't stop, mostly happens when I do something I find very interesting or I will like its very important.

"Make a deal with yourself to do something productive, and then continue the thing guilt-free. That feels much sweeter! The productive thing can be as little as to write a list, or to think about the tasks on the existing list and what it would feel like to do them." Most of the times where I should stop but don't, are when the next thing I need to do, is something that takes more then 60 minutes until its finished, so I can't say to my self to just do it 5 minutes.

"Technical solution, such as Leechblock NG browser plugin to limit usage of some websites. Could have a time limit, or time of day limit, and can do a hard block or “soft” block by going black/white." Yes, since the wifi block works great (if I remember to put out the SIM) I maybe should expand technical solutions to cover more.