"What kind of mushrooms did you put in the mushroom sauce?"

Maybe watch Dominion

I was pressured into going hunting a few times with my dad growing up, and I ended up killing a few deer. It's something I'm not proud of, one among many things I came to regret later in life.

I used to think "If you can't or won't kill it personally, then you shouldn't eat it" was an argument in support of hunting. Now I think of it as an argument in support of vegetarianism. Funny how perspective changes everything...

What's also funny is how as a society we say things like "kids who kill bugs grow up to be psychopaths," yet we totally normalize hunting as a sport. Why is that? For that matter, why don't we say "anyone who eats animal flesh is a psychopath?"

As if being five steps removed from the suffering and death somehow abstracts the cruelty so that one can indulge in the pleasure of what is produced by it without bearing any moral culpability in the processes by which that meat arrived on one's plate?

Why is it only the forms of cruelty that society doesn't accept as cultural pastimes that are considered taboo? I should rephrase. Why does society accept some forms of cruelty and not others?

+1 to the existential exploration.

A little more lot and she'll eventually stumble in to "Where did this existence come from? Why is there matter to have a universe, why is there any existence at all? If God exists, how was he created?"

You're just casually slogging through dissociative existentialism on a regular basis?

It was for me too. That’s why I opt for the tofu now.

This goes back way further than ownership. We’re talking millions of years. Dinosaurs feasting on dinosaurs. We’re a little speck of dust on a speck of dust in the blink of an eye to the vast, uncaring universe.

//  I cooked a steak tonight 
//           and was feeling    alien
// 
//  How weird this gross piece
//           of cold raw flesh
//             on a cold plate is
//
//  and I was thinking 
//                I am just an animal 
//  with the luxury of packaged flesh
//              and is it human flesh? 
//  Like 
//                    I wouldn't know

//  We just believe it's a cow  but
//
//                         we don't
//
//               have fucking proof
//
//                      of anything
//
//  
//  The knife went through the same
// 
//          as if it was my own leg
// 
//  -Mom

Fuck that, get her elected

OP's mom definitely has a lot of dick in her, if that's what you're asking.

I find the juxtaposition of the innocuous lead in ("text from my mom") with the rather unhinged text funny. The comparison to poetry, which I personally associate with peacefulness, adds to the expectation that it's going to be a pleasant text, which gets subverted spectacularly. I can also imagine the mom's encounter with the steak, resulting in them drafting the text to their child, which makes me chuckle because it's such a silly thing to experience.

It's less explicitly funny than a lot of things, but the subtlety doesn't mean it isn't funny. Humor is subjective and all, but there's plenty of funny to be found here for most people.