this post was submitted on 16 Aug 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] zikzak025@lemmy.world 180 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Always take the upfront cash! Currency devalues over time so that 7 billion could be worthless by tomorrow. But $19 invested correctly today could be worth a trillion dollars by tomorrow.

[–] lookitsjustin@lemmy.ca 63 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Very smart. You should teach a class on this stuff.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 40 points 3 days ago (1 children)

For one easy payment of $19 today and one really hard payment of $7B tomorrow.

Nah easy money cause they show you how to turn that $19 into a trillion by tomorrow so for the low fee of $7B and $19 you get to walk away with $993B in profit.

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[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 41 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Typical askreddit post, lol.

Would you [moderately be inconvenienced for a somewhat long-ish time] for [ridiculous amount of money]?

Right up there with all the “have you ever sexy sexed the sexything? Would you if a sexyperson was involved?”

[–] v4ld1z@lemmy.zip 20 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"What's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed"

right up there with "Women of reddit: do you like [absolutely generic and traditionally handsome trait or article of clothing] on men?"

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Ladies, do you like guys with visible mustard stains on their shirt?

I heard that paired with loud chewing noises is sure to attract a fine femoid

[–] ptolemai@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

7B in funds managed by Situationally Unaware

[–] pulsey@feddit.org 1 points 1 day ago
[–] nullify3112@lemmy.world 23 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

I’d wait until 23:58 to make my decision and then go for $19 because who knows what can happen in 2 seconds

[–] Eheran@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Matty_r@programming.dev 15 points 2 days ago

You think he has time to count that many numbers? He's got $19 to spend!

[–] Godort@lemmy.ca 51 points 3 days ago (1 children)

$19 right now, obviously. If I get hit by a bus and die between now and tomorrow, then I'll have ended up with nothing

[–] GreenCrunch@piefed.blahaj.zone 24 points 3 days ago (1 children)

think of the tax implications too!

[–] EastofEdson@piefed.ca 11 points 3 days ago (2 children)

No no. There are wealth companies out there that you can pay millions to and they will make sure you don't have to pay any taxes.

I'd still take the $19 though. Sure money now is better than potential money in the future.

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[–] Shindo66@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Can I borrow against the 7 billion? Ill find someone to lend me 1 million today and ill give them 2 million tomorrow

Zamn 100% daily interest

[–] yoriaiko@lemmy.blahaj.zone 30 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Spoiler - I'm from future, very next week to be exact, and I have some news for Ya.

Tomorrow, exactly 18 hours from I'm commenting now, Epstein files will leak. Whole murica will collapse within next 2 hours. Dollars as currency will collapse instantly too!

7 billions dollar will be worthy less than 19 today, if You manage to exchange the currency to any other - get value of $19.

Actually, unsure, depends if 7 billions gonna be in coins, paper or digital money. That amount of paper could be worth little more than $19 (that paper is not burnable, so still meh), coins, as metal, should be worthy way more.

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

That would be so cool

[–] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)
[–] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 35 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

$19 right now. It says "7 billions dollars", and there's no real currency called billions dollars.

19, duh, it's a bigger number than 7.

I'm about to go to sleep. I'll sleep better knowing I have $19, but probably wouldn't sleep at all knowing $7 billion is showing up tomorrow. I don't think I'm cut out for the billionaire life, but I'm prepared to try.

[–] ThatGuy46475@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago

Nice try J. G. Wentworth

[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 3 days ago

Both. First timeline I take the billion, invented time travel and enter the second timeline to go get the $19 too.

[–] techpb@lemmy.zip 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

19 dollar fortnite card, who wants it?

[–] wezzzy@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 days ago

And yes im giving it away

[–] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 days ago

Tick. tick, tick people. Let's go, now! There may not be another tomorrow. /s

[–] nieceandtows@programming.dev 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I'll take the 7 billions dollars tomorrow. Even if it's some Ugadogobindan dollar where 7 billions of it is worth less than $19, the max I lose is $19, so I'm gonna take that risk.

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[–] CoryCoolguy@lemmy.myserv.one 7 points 3 days ago

I'm getting $7,000,000,019. How? Well I take the $19 right now for starters. Then I spend the next 24 hours trying to think of a plan to secure the 7B as well.

[–] kboos1@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago

$19. I've seen enough evil genie movies. It will never be tomorrow, it's always today. Tomorrow is the promise of today.

[–] HowDawg@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

$19 right now. Then I have it right now. Tomorrow never comes so I wouldn't get that 7B.

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delayed gratification is only unlocked when you have over 250 iq (which I have) so I pick

[–] Pacattack57@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

A bird in hand is worth 2 in the bush. Boom now I have 14 billion dollars

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 4 points 3 days ago

I can wait til tomorrow. 🤷‍♂️

[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

I dunno, I could really go for a pizza right now...

[–] 1800doctorb@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

I’m worried about the taxes due on that $7 billion. With tax brackets and that math, I’d probably come out ahead with the $19. This is why I’ve declined every raise I’ve been offered, don’t want to slip into that next tax rate.

[–] spicehoarder@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 days ago

The horse's name was friday

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 4 points 3 days ago

Always take the lump sum!

[–] aMockTie@piefed.world 5 points 3 days ago

Income or debt?

[–] DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (4 children)

I don't think I'd want to be a billionaire. A hundred million? Yeah. But, any more than that I think fucks too hard with the head. It's an impossible amount to understand, and the power that comes with it corrupts.

You might say, "then, just give most of it away", and yeah, that makes sense, but I don't know how fast it happens. I don't know if I'd be able to. I think once I realized it was really mine, it might be hard to "just give it away". I don't know what that corruption feels like.

And, I'm not sure I want to.

No. I'll take the $19 and I'll leave being a billionaire to the people who handle it so well.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Just push the money toward a good cause. You don’t have to be a billionaire for long.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago

Go to casino and put it all on black.

No, red.

No, no, black! Yeah, black...

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[–] smeenz@lemmy.nz 4 points 3 days ago

... or $1 for grammar lessons.

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