A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
Steve Bannon filmed Jeffrey Epstein for 15 hours. His 'documentary' has never surfaced.
The clip supposedly promoted a documentary, "The Monsters: Epstein's Life Among the Global Elite," from Bannon's production company Victory Films. Before Epstein went to jail on sex-trafficking charges in July 2019, Bannon spent months in the financier's homes in Manhattan and Paris. He boasted that he shot 15 hours' worth of video.
This assumes she's honest and willing to die for the truth, over lying for her freedom.
In all likelihood she'll rationalize and pander for her freedom, saying what needs to be said so her case is reversed.
They look out for their own.
Of course she's going to lie, she was found guilty for perjury and Trump's personal lawyer is meeting with her
When comes comes back from their ~~delay tactics~~ recess, she's going to tell a story about how she's actually the biggest victim, how Epstein was actually terrified Trump would find out and stop his pedophile ring single handedly, like Superman
And if she does a good enough job, just maybe she'll get a pardon and end up leading CPS or something
Its also playing Huey Lewis and the News
“Wow, you’ve got the whole room tarped up—you guys doing some painting later?”