I think the notion of "choice" or "fault" here is a little questionable, I understand your argument broadly (that's what I tried to do in the last paragraph), so maybe it's mostly just a language issue (I don't think saying it is your "fault" or "choice" really means the same thing as saying that it's "up to you").
But I believe you're contradicting yourself when you say that you both have to act and get out of situation such as abuse (not be defeatist) and but also learn to be fine with the situation (which reads like admitting defeat to me). I think this confusion between an actionable scenario (you can change things around you) and a non-actionable scenario (you can only change your outlook) is at the core of it.
Regardless I agree that self-pity is an absolute poison, but I'd tend to believe the way you put it is perhaps more controversial (because of what it implies or leaves out) than the point itself. Choosing not to suffer can also be a form of defeatism.
I don't know, thinking more about it, I frankly don't understand both why on earth you would feel responsible for this, and why do you think that this would ultimately be a lesser harm. It really sounds to me like you are not putting anyone at risk and ALSO that this change of license wouldn't actually help anyone.
I even understand the argument that copyleft might be detrimental to some projects because of big for-profits contributions, but this reads like a cop-out "for free". I would understand a change of license to protect your own ass (without advocating for others to do the same), but this is saying "I don't do copyleft because someone, somewhere, might be hurt by an abusive corporation or state for reasons vaguely related to my choice of license".
By this logic, knowing that your project benefits the interests of those who jailed innocent workers, shouldn't you just take your project offline altogether? Aren't you worried that you're actually taking agency away from both those workers AND from people trying to offer an alternative to those clearly evil corporations?
I'm sorry it's not even your decision that's driving me a bit nuts, it's your work and you license it however the fuck you want, it's the logic behind it.