Finally, a healthy and eco-friendly alternative to genAI girlfriend!
this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2026
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Taught mine to roll a joint, then he took all my weed and sold it, came back acting like he had no idea what happened and was all like idk I just found this new Apple Watch.
Unfortunately, you cannot bring the smoking drinking monkey indoors at most establishments these days
Never drink alone. You aren't alone in a bar. This is a Pandemic era innovation in monkeybusiness.
Man, Europe sounds miserable these days!
You try and keep the smoking drinking money outside without me, I'll be inside drinking and smoking with my monkey
Can I order a smoking monkey? I don't drink much anymore
Well, they do drink no matter what, but they dont need much!
that monkey better stay the hell out of my rum!
If it doesn't smoke is it really a drinking buddy?
$14.99?!?
I'll do all of that for free. Just the cost of booze and smokes. I too am not picky about brand and will drink most anything. (I'm ok at pickpocketing)
Yeah but you're not a monkey are you? If I wanted to drink with humans I would have done it friends or strangers at a bar.
More of an ape than a monkey, but I'm told I'm fun at parties.
Have you SEEN the price of whisky these days? The cost of getting that little fucker drunk and lightfingered is negligible, even if he smokes like a chimney
That's why I agreed to do it for free.
Can't wait to eat that monkey
The only friend I’ve ever wanted.
What if I don't want to share my liquor?
Mibkeys need like a shot of whisky to get hammered you stingy bastard! I'd call you a caveman but they at least would throw a dog a bone
Are you drunk now? If so... MY MAN!
And no... Joey doesn't share booze