this post was submitted on 28 Feb 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

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3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

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-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

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-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

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-Do not Brigade other Communities

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-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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[–] totally_human_emdash_user@piefed.blahaj.zone 85 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't wanna be your enemy 😁

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[–] SarahValentine@lemmy.blahaj.zone 75 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] kernelle@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 2 weeks ago

Girl, you're -

[–] Contextual_Idiot@sh.itjust.works 74 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 34 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Bitcoin. One hundred…

You just blew it.

[–] pupbiru@aussie.zone 15 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

sell at $100… got it! thanks future me! will do!

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[–] Serinus@lemmy.world 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You buy 5 bitcoins for $450 each in 2016. It's what you can afford. You sell them for $10,000 each in 2018, timing it decently just before a bigger drop.

Congrats on your $48k.

[–] Contextual_Idiot@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Look at this youngin, turning 18 in 2016. Enjoy your knees and shoulders while you can.

2009-2010, you hear about this "Bitcoin" thing for the first time. You remember some old fart telling you about it years ago, but you had no idea what they were talking about and assumed they had mental problems. You decide to download it and start mining it, it doesn't hurt anything. It just uses your CPU to mine them. You let it run and quickly forget about it. Eventually, you get tired of it slowing your computer down. You have a few thousand coins by now, so you shut the miner down and put your wallet somewhere safe. Then you forget all about it, until about 2021...

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[–] lichtmetzger@discuss.tchncs.de 60 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] stoicmaverick@lemmy.world 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've never understood why anyone would pre-order anything digital. Were you afraid they would run out?

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[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 51 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] wavebeam@lemmy.world 37 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] communist@lemmy.frozeninferno.xyz 36 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] gergolippai@lemmy.world 32 points 1 week ago

Buy Bit Coin

[–] db2@lemmy.world 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] SpookyBogMonster@lemmy.ml 27 points 2 weeks ago

"you're a girl"

[–] Draegur@lemmy.zip 25 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (6 children)

first choice:
PURSUE NUCLEAR ENGINEERING

runner up:
YOU AIN'T MALE

third place:
ATTENTION DEFICIT: REAL

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[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] mrnobody@reddthat.com 26 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Invest in ~~Nvidia~~ yourself

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[–] ChocolateFrostedSugarBombs@lemmy.world 24 points 2 weeks ago (15 children)

Sell Bitcoin 2025


This tells myself to first buy Bitcoin so I have some to sell. Then gives me the year it was at the highest peak. By then I'll be intrigued and will be paying attention. I may not hit exactly March which was the highest point but I'll still be much better off.

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[–] RelativePlatypus@piefed.world 24 points 2 weeks ago

It gets worse

[–] lumettaria@sopuli.xyz 24 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You a lesbian

[–] Someplaceunknown@leminal.space 22 points 2 weeks ago (8 children)
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[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)
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[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 22 points 1 week ago (3 children)
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[–] SparrowHawk@feddit.it 22 points 1 week ago (6 children)
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[–] hOrni@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Two would be enough, "buy bitcoin".

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[–] Vespair@lemmy.zip 20 points 2 weeks ago

Just be punk.

[–] muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works 20 points 2 weeks ago

You’re a bottom.

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 20 points 2 weeks ago

Don't do it

[–] SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Transgender, AuDHD, (secret third thing. Or maybe just bitcoin)

..I'm sure my 18 year old ass would process this information in a calm and reasonable manner, lol

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[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

Suck. My. Balls.

(He'd think it's fucking hilarious)

[–] AlecSadler@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Let's see...

don't sell bitcoin

don't sell doge

don't buy restaurant

don't date XYZ

don't date ABC

don't buy restaurant

don't quit place

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[–] Diddlydee@feddit.uk 15 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] MilitantAtheist@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago

Buy All Bitcoin

[–] funkyfarmington@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] EvilHankVenture@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago

You need therapy.

[–] Zikeji@programming.dev 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] BenLeMan@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Gurei@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 week ago

Read scholarship terms.

(Got fucked over majorly at DeVry because I trusted actual adults in authority positions for my guidance and wish I had the backbone back then to call them out on it.)

[–] damnthefilibuster@lemmy.world 13 points 2 weeks ago

invest in bitcoin!!!!!!!

[–] LilithElina@literature.cafe 13 points 1 week ago (3 children)
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[–] T13URF@feddit.org 13 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Take LSD now

[–] piranhaconda@mander.xyz 13 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Tossup between "buy Bitcoin now" and "you are autistic"

The first one, because, obviously. The second one, because I didn't find out until I was in my 30s. My lemmy account is older than my diagnosis.

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