5parky

joined 2 years ago
[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago

Congress and the judicial branch have fast tracked themselves on a course to redundancy for the past 85 days.

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

Raw irritated penis

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

I can tell when the batteries on my cordless mouse have died. There's a strange feeling of resistance when the mouse is active, but when it's dead, nothing.

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 98 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

I've been saying this for months. How long until 47 "has a stroke."

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

Jesus is always on the job site by 730 with his tools and a smile on his face.

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 8 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

You don't know old until you've had to change the IRQ for your sound card because wolf3d.exe's settings were different than swotl.exe.

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Gimme a stoner any day. Better than trying to talk a roided up jock half way through a bottle of tequila out of punching his nana. I don't consume myself because weed just puts me to sleep. I guess I'm mellow enough.

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

Remember when Idiocracy was a farce instead of a documentary?

[–] 5parky@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I have revived multiple computers and my mom's windshield wipers with concussive application of a rubber chicken.