_druid

joined 1 month ago
[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

De Beers did it with diamond engagement rings as well.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago

It's when you pee in someone's mouth during a blowie.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago

Any port in a storm, I always say.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 days ago

I've always been afraid of being killed by a drunk driver, or dying while at work. Now both of those things can happen at the same time.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 28 points 4 days ago

If this is another attempt to get me to stare into a laser, I'm going to say "Fool me once."

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Microplastics weren't enough, let's give the sealife macroplastics.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

No volume, vibrate, led, or push notifications. If you want my attention badly enough, call. And I will screen the call and text you back at my convenience. I will not be on a leash. Now excuse me while I doomscroll for 2 to 17 hours.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 week ago

For the cats, at least. I wouldn't recommend doing it for yourself. I learned that the hard way.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 22 points 1 week ago (2 children)

My cats will be about to throw up, so I'll slide a paper towel under them, and they will try to move to get back to the floor.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 42 points 1 week ago (7 children)

You're absolutely right, as that cat will puke in the most inconvenient spot.

[–] _druid@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 weeks ago

True, but most of the oppressors are boomers.

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