Authentik! i've been using it since over a year and its been a wonderful experience. supports many protocols and is updated regularly, as a beginner i didnt have difficulty setting it up, has decent documentation for integrations.
sk
I went with alpha, beta, gamma ...
i subscribe to the release page of the repo in my rss reader. simple and effective.
I've been using mailcow for about a year and i am very satisfied, it checks all your boxes and is easy to configure and deploy over docker.
@0x0 headscale/tailscale. I have a VPS that gives me a public IP so i use that to host a headscale control plane.
Public services: my social network(hubzilla), Email(mailcow), Matrix chat, Peertube.
Private: my media (jellyfin, audiobookshelf, calibre, homeassistant.
I enjoy the freedom that comes with this and its like having your own home on the internet. I have a very modest setup but its enough to host my friends and family so nothing fancy like k8s. Just a refurbished optiplex running docker :)
have you tried hubzilla? its multipurpose.