Or something that goes a bit deeper onto each instance and explains them better? I have a mutual on mastodon that I recommended Lemmy to, and tried to link join-lemmy.org/instances, but it doesn't really do much to warn about hexbear/lemmygrad/.ml/etc. Those instances are defederated from a LOT of lemmy and i don't want my moot to sign up there and not even know that they're not really experiencing the Lemmy experience that I'm recommending.

I don't wanna start a war in the comments about instance dramas, I just wanna find a better resource to recommend Lemmy as a 'reddit alternative' -w-

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[–] 5 points 19 hours ago (13 children)
  • [–] 5 points 19 hours ago (12 children)

    I've had fine interactions with one of the devs, anyway. Not so much individual users.

    I unsubscribed from all their communities I'd formerly signed up to because of too many toxic interactions.

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  • [–] 3 points 11 hours ago (1 child)

    i think its usually one of the lemmygrad devs that crashes out quite often that you avoid.

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  • [–] 2 points 11 hours ago

    It's various users, and I forgot to mention HexBear as well. I'm all for Palestine, but one time at my community I posted an excerpt about a moderate-minded Jewish guy in Israel, and they lost their excrement. Dogpiled the post and started screaming the most outrageous stuff, way out of proportion to the actual example.

    And it was just a comic book.

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  • [–] 4 points 19 hours ago (9 children)

    I joined years before the first reddit exodus and back then the .ml instance was one of like three available instances.

    I keep reading about instances blocking .ml and everybody on .ml being a tanky but I just wanna browse memes 🤷‍♂️

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  • [–] 2 points 18 hours ago (8 children)

    Yeah it seems like something has definitely changed. I was just digging through 3yr old threads on .ml and hexbear this morning and there's a way different tone from now. Like, same politics but they're not at war. Can I get your take on what happened?

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  • [+] 1 point 17 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (7 children)
  • [–] 5 points 13 hours ago (5 children)

    Idk, I give everyone some grace at first until they come out with the most batshit opinion conceivable. It's not every .ml user, but it's usually an .ml user. And the communities are flooded with the worst .ml users.

    Just today, I was banned and had all my comments deleted in a thread. What did I say? A commenter said that victims of Republican domestic policy deserve it because they live in a country that has done bad things to the global south. I pointed out that those domestic victims (e.g. immigrants) aren't the same people who victimized the global south. They said I couldn't fully trip them, and doubled down on the privilege of domestic victims. I said they were a sociopath and that's literally the same argument people make to justify killing Palestinian kids. Banned and deleted.

    Again, it's not that every .ml user is an evil red fascist tankie, but a lot of them are and they flock together.

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  • [+] 1 point 13 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (4 children)
  • [–] 3 points 13 hours ago* (3 children)

    I brought the same energy I was given, which was not civil. The tell is that the uncivil comments of the .ml user were unaffected, and the comments I made which were civil were also removed.

    If you're interested, I can try to recall my exact comments. The first was, roughly, "Do you think the children crushed by the domestic machine are responsible for the pain inflicted on the global south?"

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  • [+] 1 point 12 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (2 children)
  • [–] 3 points 12 hours ago* (1 child)

    if rules are applied unequally, i'd kind of want to find a different instance

    Then you should find a different instance. The '"civility" rule, based on personal experience, is just an excuse to take action against people who disagree with the groupthink. I've never seen it used against an uncivil person who toes the ideological line.

    Official rules being straightforward doesn't mean the enforcement of those rules is consistent. The real rules are "Agree with the .ml ideology and you can say whatever you want. Disagree, and a justification to ban will be found".

    Also I don't think you can really be "banned" from the platform. You can be banned from instances, but there are other instances. If you follow rules, most instances will be fine for you.

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  • [–] 4 points 17 hours ago

    All that's unfortunate and understandable, but for a long while I simply didn't care what instances a user was from. My opinion was gradually turned by too many .ML users basically having the worst possible take upon something, making it extremely unpleasant to talk to them about whatever the subject was.

    Again, I didn't really care about the reputation stuff for a long while, and wanted to make my own decision on the matter. They kinda wound up making it for me.

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