Upton Sinclair about to rise from the grave to drop The Jungle II.

How am I supposed to avoid eating lead when they keep making delicious new flavors

P^b^OR

Mmm... extra sweet cinnamon.

what was the source of the lead contamination?

Just stop reporting on the poison slop, it's not news anymore.

as long as in the US LOL
WTF are these people doing?

How is production running guys? We gotta get these new cheetos out to the American consumer ASAP.

Well, everything is going ok, but the lead is not sticking to the cheetos that great. Check.. Dough, no problems. Frying to a puff, no problems. Glueing cheese powder, all good. Lead bath... All cheetos are just floating. Best we can do is trace amounts.

Well, let's add trace amounts up to the maximum allowed. Hmm, shall we?