I wonder which particular cult made this. I'm gonna guess it was the Mormons. I suffered through a JW childhood in the long ago, and this doesn't seem like their style.
this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2025
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Straw goat attack. He's not angry, he's just tired of religious people trying to convert him.
Not to mention how many of his ancestors were sacrificed by so many different religions and demonified the image of goats.
different religions and demonifie
To their credit, he and his ancestors are delicious with a little curry.
Every time I tell a religious person I’m an atheist they either freeze up completely, which put a damper on the conversation, or they get very angry and tell me I’m disgraceful. My experience with religious people is that they are very uncool.
To be fair, they've been conditioned that atheists are basically guys driving around in unmarked vans offering kids candy because atheism is SUPER bad for their business.
You mean, I don't have to get up on Sunday, I don't have to be pressured to give 30% of my salary to the church, and I don't have to deal with a bunch of racist, immoral pricks dotted around the congregation because they're there for 'forgiveness' and I should be 'accepting' of that?
we used to do that, but have you seen the cost of candy nowadays? who can afford to go around giving candy to children?
Dude, I'm in a large neighborhood, we gave away 60 lbs last year, I had to take out a second mortgage.
Just tell them you're a Muslim or something
It’s their problem. I’m only on this planet to observe 😉
My parents made me go to Church growing up it's probably the reason I'm a delinquent, it's so fucking boring and I felt like my soul was being sucked out of energy
I had a 'pastor' try and witness to me yesterday, insisting that his spiritual experiences made him right, while the spiritual experiences of people that converted to Judaism or Islam meant they had been deceived by the devil.
It's always funny how their experience could never have been caused by devil trickery, only the others'. Same as the divine revelation of the word, only theirs is truly divine and correct, unlike those filthy others
If you distrust someone because of their religious beliefs, you're probably a bad person.
Then again, I don't trust Christians. Hypocrisy at its finest.
If you distrust someone because of their religious beliefs, you're probably a bad person.
Wait.. why? Why is it bad to distrust someone who believes in an invisible friend who grants wishes well into their 30s?
Its worth noting that most of these people were indoctrinated into their beliefs since they were born, and many of them attend church weekly to reaffirm their beliefs. They were raised surrounded by christians, were told christianity is true, and think that if you question god you will be consciously tortured for eternity. They're not just a bunch of idiots.
True, if they're young. At some point you are accountable for the contents of your own brain.
I'm not saying it's easy. I'm not saying it's safe. I am saying the unexamined life is not worth living.
That’s why a friend of mine is a 37 y/o virgin. 3 more years and he can cut out the middle man.
You can trust someone without expecting pure rationality from them
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If someone is claiming God is on their side, then absolutely they should not be trusted.
A good example was Huckabee's message to Trump where he says he shouldn't listen to humble old Huckabee, but he should listen to God, who, coincidentally, is saying exactly the same thing as Huckabee.
If you have your faith but make no assertions about it's validity over other opinions nor that it confers divine authority to the words or deeds of any person, cool, I respect that faith. I'm inclined to have some faith myself, but I'm not about to claim any of it is more than my personal wild guesses and hope.
However organized religion is generally exploitable and bad people take advantage...
Buncha witnesses tried approaching me the other day as I was tending to my flower bed. I sprayed them with my water hose, and yelled "where is your god now, feel the might of my athiest hose, let its water soak sin into your skin" they started crying and saying "were gonna get our parents and they will call the cops". Turns out they were "girl scouts" selling "cookies" and now I have a court date. At least I didn't get witnessed, score one for this athiest
Bro scored a date
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And they have the gall to act like they're better than you because you're working a mininum wage job on a Sunday.
"You should be in church right now!"
"If I was, then who the fuck would be serving you at Cracker Barrel right now?"
What does the verb "to witness for" mean?
To try to convert someone.
What is the deal with religious people and conversion therapy?
For most of them, it’s because they truly, deeply believe that if they don’t convert you, you’re going to burn in hell for eternity when you die.
For most of the leaders of those sorts of churches, it’s because more people means more money for that new private jet they’re saving up for.
...if they don’t convert you, you’re going to burn in hell for eternity when you die.
Some like it hot. Leave me alone.
conversion therapy is not at all the same thing. conversion therapy is usually phycological abuse of already participating religious people who are trying to "convert" their sexual orientation to "normal".
to convert someone is to try and get them to join your church.
they're very different things.
They're not completely unrelated.
"They think they have it figured out, why are they so sad?"
Well Jimmy, when you realize religious fanatics would rather shoot homeless people then feed them, its a bit of a downer!
They're also happier when you're not around, Jimmy.
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The fact that I can't tell if this is parody or not is sad.
It’s parody, but the word “witness” in this context gives me flashbacks regardless
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I'm not even a atheist really and preachers were telling my co workers to not witness for me. My statements were hard to dismiss and their bullshit has too many holes in it. I made one of my co workers fellow god bothers get up and leave when I told them why their devil would never tempt me. It wasn't even my concept. I read a very short story one time about the devil being reluctant to offer deals anymore. It was afraid someone would ask for something that would destroy it. Of course the next guy asked for it. What he asked for went something like this.
"Without any change in myself whatsoever I wish to be the most evil soul to have or will exists."
That is when they told my coworker terry to never bring up jesus with me again. It was a great day for me and I told him It was a victory for me.
Edit: Here it is "Little man wishes "that without any change whatsoever in myself, I become the most evil, stupid and miserable person on earth. Satan screams."
The story is "Millennium" by Fredric Brown
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