That man has more red flags than a flag football team.
this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2025
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Asklemmy
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Sounds perfect for this woman with a nearly equal amount of red flags
I'd argue the man is worse. Not saying it's right, but OP is around 18 and I only see that she wanted to date him out of loneliness. What other red flags do you see that I didn't catch?
I'm not going to tell you what to do. I am going to point out the red flags you cited and ask what you would say to a friend who was considering dating someone who behaves like this.
he kept talking about... that i should’ve ditched my bf for him
In other words, he did not respect your relationship when you were in one.
badmouthed not only his gf of a few years
He handles struggles in a relationship by badmouthing his partner to others,
he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia
and uses an armchair diagnosis as an excuse to get out of a relationship instead of just saying it's not working for him anymore like an adult.
he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn’t want to be his gf
He doesn't care about your preferences, and tries to manipulate you when they don't match his.
Girl, I can't believe no one here is telling you that the behavior you've described is absolutely not "having a man that treats you right". Guilt tripping, trashing his own girlfriend while being with her, telling you to be unfaithful, ignoring your homosexuality...
Hell, the way you've described him makes me wonder if his girlfriend was actually schizophrenic or if he just gaslit the fuck out of her and ditched her when it started to catch up to him. Did you know her personally? Did she show signs of schizophrenia that couldn't be explained by gaslighting? Did he try to work with her through her potential schizophrenia? That'd be another huge red flag: if she showed signs of disability and instead of trying to work with her, he dumped her.
Don't do it.
You're just sad, hurt, and about to get yourself into a hell of a lot more hurt if you listen to this strange compulsion of yours. Chill. Take a deep breath. Find some lesbian chicks. There've gotta be dommy lesbians around you if you're in a somewhat populated area in the US. Make friends, fuck your friends, have fun, and maybe you'll eventually end up with a girlfriend or two (and maybe a trans puppygirl too).
i didn’t know all the details, he just said that she showed signs of schizophrenia and acted weird. i didn’t know her and didn’t know their relationship, but i know he did leave her because she had hallucinations, paranoia, thought objects were real (like dolls), and apparently age regressed a lot. he said she got too clingy and “weird” and even “crazy” for his liking. (which ik that word is stigmatizing in that context because in high school, we were told not to call ppl who showed signs of mental illness crazy)
He sounds extremely abusive.