this post was submitted on 04 Jan 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

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[–] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I will not run climb or jump

I will not sit kneel or lie down

I will not cover any targets

I will not use offensive language

I will not make physical contact with other players

I will play hard, play smart, and play to survive

And I might stab a motherfucker

[–] mangaskahn@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Dude, nostalgia rush. Thank you.

[–] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Figured I’d give you another nostalgia hit:

Attention, Questers! Your mission is now complete! Please return to the airlock on the lower level. The airlock door is below the beacon. Please holster your laser and place your pack on any rack, and thank you for playing LaserQuest!

[–] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Later on, parts were changed to be less violent.

“Targets” became “sensors”, and the last line became “I will play fair, play smart, and give it my all”. Also, “holsters” became “holders”. But I refuse to use the new-speak.

[–] Paradachshund@lemmy.today 9 points 6 days ago

Don't worry, it's a laser knife

[–] tyler@programming.dev 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 1 points 6 days ago

Thx, corrected.

[–] FenrirIII@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago

Saw this meme with The Mummy last time. Still funny

i've wondered if there were fancy lasertags where they had flashbangs you could throw to flush out base campers. i've wondered this because i'm a crack shot. finding a nice hidey hole to snipe from has reliably gotten me and my team wins, and grenades would fuck that up.

[–] notreallyhere@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (4 children)

its not like you run out of lasers

[–] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 7 points 6 days ago

LaserQuest had unlimited ammo on the default game mode, but there were other game modes with limits. I think Qzar had limited ammo with recharge stations in their default mode.

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago

“Hold your fire, there’s no life forms aboard.”

“‘Hold your fire?’ What are we, paying by the laser now?”

[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Maybe, just maybe, that's part of the joke.

[–] notreallyhere@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

maybe I won't use my laser gun on you 💀

[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I like where this is heading... Unzips

I've heard some states/provinces and countries have capacity limits to reduce the frequency and severity of mass laserings.