There are two kinds of copes: healthy & unhealthy. What is your goal? If it's to actually heal, you need to take steps towards healthy coping.
I'm working through my unhealthy copes. Things like targeted bitterness, willfully ignoring the issues, depersonalization, detached relationships, etc.
Long-term, I ain't doin' so great. But I'm trying to be in a healthier mindset in order to get better.
Baby steps.
And in case anyone needs a reminder: forgiveness does not mean "letting it ride"— sometimes it means letting it go of the hurt that's clung onto you so that you can move forward, regardless of the other party. It's a journey.... it.. certainly is a journey.. and it will absolutely take time. And it doesn't always involve closure. That's where I personally am right now.
Anyhow. Yeah.
I don't enjoy healthy coping. It hurts a lot. But I know it's what I need to do in order not to destroy both myself & the others around me who may genuinely care.
Idk. Shit's hard, yo.
EDIT: yeeeah, one time I did nothing else except immerse myself in a video game for like 3 months straight. No joke. Addiction has a lot of forms, but they'll all fuck you up.
I get what you're saying. However, my meaning is more "this can lead you into worse problems" = unhealthy coping. Alcohol worked fantastic for me to cope! But holy shit that has often led to worse situations and terrible health consequences.
People use painting to cope. Writing. Music Ways to express yourself and explore how you feel without self-destruction. Ways to explore things that suck without potentially harming in worse ways.
Saying "this is how I cope!" while doing self-harm is unhealthy. It's a wobbly-ass crutch that is also full of glass that will hurt you if you once you lean on it too hard.
Do I blame folks for unhealthy coping? No. Not at all. I get it 100%. But a lot of it is used to numb the pain and ignore things instead of addressing it, and can turn into habit that will make your life so much worse, on top on your initial problems.