He has total control of SpaceX - he made it so "investors" have no ability to override any of his decisions.
He doesn't have full control over Tesla, because he's not a majority shareholder, and the board can vote him out.
He wants SpaceX to buy Tesla so he can have 100% control over all of it. I would place a pretty substantial bet that he buys Tesla with the same "non-voting" SpaceX shares that he sold to retail investors during the IPO.