Lesbians Like Me Joined Forces with Conservatives. Now They’re Turning on Us.
(www.queermajority.com)
It's the social trade-off to join the in-group. You get membership, but you're obligated to conform. So long as conformity is easy and light-weight, the appeal of joining the in-group can override your moral imperatives to others. But then the boundaries of acceptable behavior shift under your feet, and suddenly you can't be a part of the group without concealing or changing some fundamental part of your life.
Like, Reid Newton thinks gender transition and DEI and Critical Race Theory are all bullshit. Has she considered just... divorcing her wife and becoming straight? But no, that would be asking to much of herself. Suddenly, the cost of being a part of the in-group has grown too high, because it's a deeply personal cost.