I love competition! Except when I lose then competition is bad I need to change the rules so I'm the only one who wins. Yes I am way more deserving than other humans because I am me. And me is better.

Checkmate!

Wait, new rule you have to checkmate twice in a row to win.

Checkmate again!

New rule it only counts if we just ate salmon before playing.

Very good dish, checkmate!

New rule, you have to be me to checkmate.