this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2026
926 points (97.1% liked)

Programmer Humor

30948 readers
1058 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 313 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (12 children)

This is absolutely ridiculous. It should be migrated to Java, so it can run everywhere.

[–] tristan@tarte.nuage-libre.fr 103 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

3 billion

Devices Run Java

[–] lauha@lemmy.world 40 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

3 billion devices have been running java for past 20 years.

[–] GreenCrunch@piefed.blahaj.zone 25 points 2 weeks ago

Proof of stability!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] elvith@feddit.org 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Don't you think, that's enough already?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 52 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Except next to pools, no one should run there

[–] Klear@quokk.au 16 points 2 weeks ago

Unless you have scissors. That cancels it out.

[–] Archer@lemmy.world 33 points 2 weeks ago

J2EE ffmpeg for flip phones

[–] SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You mean JavaScript so that it does the same thing each time

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 16 points 2 weeks ago
load more comments (8 replies)
[–] fargeol@lemmy.world 219 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I hope they’re doing it with AI for faster development. Now that Claude is open source, there’s no excuse to refuse progress anymore!

[–] InFerNo@lemmy.ml 44 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Only Claude's frontend leaked, not the models

[–] vga@sopuli.xyz 40 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (4 children)

To which Anthropic answered by open sourcing the whole thing under AGPL. Didn't you see the news?

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 32 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] vga@sopuli.xyz 21 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah! April number one!

[–] Liketearsinrain@lemmy.ml 23 points 2 weeks ago

I don't want AGPL. I will use claude to rewrite it and license it MIT since that's peachy and legal now.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's unironically what ladybird (browser engine) did

[–] yessikg@fedia.io 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Ew another reason to ignore it and wait for Servo instead

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] UnfortunateShort@lemmy.world 148 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

What did Rust do to FFmpeg to make them so mad lol

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 110 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

Ah, just realized what day it is

[–] SirEDCaLot@lemmy.today 17 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

East Coast here, it's not even midnight for another 4 minutes!

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The world doesnt only exist within the US timezone ;)

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (6 replies)
[–] AudaciousArmadillo@piefed.blahaj.zone 70 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I guess not rust itself, but people telling them to switch to rust over and over again. They use a lot of assembly magic to get good performance, they aren't in C land.

[–] communism@lemmy.ml 12 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

You can embed Assembly in Rust. A lot of low-level Rust projects embed Assembly.

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] rtxn@lemmy.world 45 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The person behind their twitter account is a notorious shitter.

[–] BuboScandiacus@mander.xyz 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Well

That checks out for xitter

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world 109 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)
[–] resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Are rustaceans cantankerous?

[–] volore@scribe.disroot.org 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Does the Pope shit in the woods?

[–] SwingingTheLamp@piefed.zip 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

(Yeah, AI slop from the early days when I was checking it out.)

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] WagnasT@piefed.world 90 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Just make a rust fork of ffmpeg, it can be ffmpreg.

[–] irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 32 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] mbp@lemmy.sdf.org 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The readme is far too serious for such a silly name

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ResistingArrest@lemmy.zip 12 points 2 weeks ago

This made my fucking day… ffmpreg…

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] svcg@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 1 week ago

Yes officer, this one right here.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] mohammed_alibi@lemmy.world 65 points 2 weeks ago

Rust should switch to ffmpeg!

[–] fubarx@lemmy.world 57 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Was jokingly going to suggest a WASM version. But then: https://github.com/ffmpegwasm/ffmpeg.wasm

[–] kopasz7@sh.itjust.works 18 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I'm only asking this half jokingly, what the fuck?

[–] The_Decryptor@aussie.zone 18 points 2 weeks ago

Makes it portable across architectures while also providing sandboxing.

The fedi software I use (GoToSocial) runs both ffmpeg (Sorry, ffmpreg) and sqlite through WASM, also makes it easier to integrate it with Go code apparently.

WASM is great :) unironically

everything should switch to wasm. i'm not saying this because of arbitrarily. it's just very well thought-through. wasm automatically provides portability, sandboxing, and integration with other languages.

like, one of the things i still don't understand is why we don't have automatic sandboxing for every application. like, when i download and run a new game from steam, why isn't it automatically put in a sandbox? Why does it have full read/write access to my entire disk? i don't like that at all...

Converting everything to wasm would solve that automatically, and very easily on top of that.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] underisk@lemmy.ml 53 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Further proof that this is the shittiest holiday only celebrated by the most insufferable.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] grue@lemmy.world 32 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Huh, I guess the person who runs FFmpeg's Xitter account must live in western Europe (UTC+1:00).

[–] fxdave@lemmy.ml 18 points 2 weeks ago

The reason I don't use C, because I don't hate my life.

[–] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io 18 points 2 weeks ago

So begins the festival of fools.

[–] homes@piefed.world 14 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

Everyone knows that Swift is the language of the future!

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] webkitten@piefed.social 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Pfft; rewrite it in DHTML and ActiveX.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] osaerisxero@kbin.melroy.org 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Is green the high vis color in Europe?

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›