this post was submitted on 24 Apr 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] GreenShimada@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

I knew a guy that did this with his gf regularly. They'd take a full day off, phones off, he'd pop a viagra and they'd both do a molly.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 5 points 6 hours ago
[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 13 points 8 hours ago

We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.

[–] hildegarde@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 8 hours ago

If that's how you feel about your penis, you should consider taking hormones about it.

[–] dgdft@lemmy.world 7 points 10 hours ago

Not that I disagree with the post… but the general public out here wilding about vaccines and tylenol and fluoride and shit yet missing this extra-stupid medical “conspiracy” will never not be funny to me.

The FDA doesn’t like greenlighting drugs of dubious direct clinical benefit with high abuse potential, so for the sake of expediency, Pfizer decided to push the narrative that Viagra definitely wasn’t fun unless you had peepee problems. No one wants to look like they have peepee problems, so not enough people who’ve tried it are willing to call a spade a spade and say it’s fun af regardless of age or necessity.

Thus the narrative persists.

[–] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 7 points 11 hours ago

Bro your dick supposed to get drained, not do the draining.

[–] Th4tGuyII@fedia.io 27 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Enjoy the peace of impotency? Surely he doesn't think his penis actually has a brain right? Its your brain that makes you horny, and it will still make you horny even if the equipment don't work anymore.

If you're that horny-brained that its causing you stress, your best option (aside from therapy, cause that's expensive) is to get offline and find a hobby to distract your mind with.

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 14 points 16 hours ago

Yes exactly! That's why I go offline to go bird watching as a hobby! Occasionally, as a treat, I'll peep in on naked adults with their curtains open.

[–] Bluescluestoothpaste@sh.itjust.works 14 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

If you’re that horny-brained that its causing you stress

That's every 19 year old ever lmao, and yes im extremely grateful i dont get like that anymore lol

[–] Tiral@lemmy.world 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Well that's different. You're in like overdrive. Plus if you're 13 and need Viagra there's an issue probably.

Well yeah and now that im not the last thing i would ever do is take a pill to force an erection lol

[–] MintyFresh@lemmy.world 105 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

I'm blinded with rage by the comma he ended his post with,

[–] QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works 8 points 13 hours ago (1 children)
[–] MintyFresh@lemmy.world 3 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] elephantium@lemmy.world 3 points 1 hour ago

Add a comma? Also hell,

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 34 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (2 children)

That feels like a valid poetic choice to me, but that “who’s” is getting to me,

Though tbf, referring to your penis as thirst itself is also pretty poetic

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[–] DrBob@lemmy.ca 48 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

I'm 60. They are useful for recreational purposes. Going one round is not a problem, but the second round? I used to measure refractory periods in minutes, then hours. Now I could use a calendar.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 14 points 16 hours ago

I'm 40. Lmao. 3 to 5 business days. not really, but it sure feels like that compared to my younger self.

[–] BreakerSwitch@lemmy.world 12 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

This reminds me of that Russian woman who subdued and bound a burgular to a chair, after which she fed him only dick pills and kept him as a sex toy for a week.

I should risk breaking into Russian homes, I think

[–] hanrahan@slrpnk.net 1 points 8 hours ago

do u know her address per chance, not asking for a friend either :)

[–] CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world 1 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

A perfectly normal and healthy guy doesn’t really need a boner pill to have sex for a hours unless you mean literally nonstop I guess, at least that’s my experience

[–] daannii@lemmy.world 6 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago) (1 children)

Depends on age. Most men , as they get older, aren't able to get an erection as easily or have it last as long as they could in their early 20s. And certainly not at the same level of 16.

I'm a woman. But this is what I've heard and also what I know about biology of reproductive system.

It's totally normal to change. It's part of the body's maturation. Nothing for men to worry about or think there is something wrong with them. There isn't. Women's bodys change too.

Also I'm sure most men are grateful it doesn't work like a 16 year olds their whole life.

Imagine having to carry around a book or backpack all the time to hide an unwanted erection.

Guys have told me these incidents were mortifying to them as teenagers.

[–] backalleycoyote@lemmy.today 4 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Guys have told me these incidents were mortifying to them as teenagers.

Unintentional boners are the bane of being a teenage boy. There was one dude who did this elaborate “will you go to prom with me” in the middle of the lunch room and when she said “yes” he got a little too excited. We laughed but it’s more sympathetic laughter because it happens to everyone.

[–] daannii@lemmy.world 4 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

If it's any consolation, as a teenage girl, I was largely unaware of this phenomenon occurring.

I thought when guys brought their math book with them to the chalkboard they brought it to use if needed.

Or forgot they were carrying it.

Idk. I never thought about it much.

I can't even remember one incident of seeing a teen boy with a pitched tent in school. I'm sure there was. But nothing stands out.

I don't think most girls that age (or at least my generation) understood what an erection really was or how it worked. Most of us were oblivious to the teen boy struggle.

We were dealing with periods and soaked underwater. The latter of which was never explained in health class.

Us gals worried that a dark spot or wet spot was visible on the back of our pants.

They really don't educate kids very well about these things.

God, puberty was the worst wasn't it?

[–] MML@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 hours ago

Everyone knew at our school, hell people had sex in the hallways, it's always interesting to meet someone who actually got to be a teenager

[–] Holytimes@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 hours ago

Horny and stupid. We could fix the stupid but that would require effort and education.

And for some reason people seem against that...

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 62 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

it's because I won. If I do desire to, I'll awaken the tyrant and beat him up for my pleasure.

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[–] abbiistabbii@piefed.blahaj.zone 34 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

This reads like something written by Marcus Aurelius.

[–] abrake@lemmy.world 48 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (2 children)

Plato, Republic, Book I, Cephalus' speech:

How well I remember the aged poet Sophocles, when in answer to the question, How does love suit with age, Sophocles⁠—are you still the man you were? Peace, he replied; most gladly have I escaped the thing of which you speak; I feel as if I had escaped from a mad and furious master. His words have often occurred to my mind since, and they seem as good to me now as at the time when he uttered them. For certainly old age has a great sense of calm and freedom; when the passions relax their hold, then, as Sophocles says, we are freed from the grasp not of one mad master only, but of many.

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 10 points 18 hours ago

Goddamit Sophocles

[–] gon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 19 hours ago

There's just no fucking way, holy crap!!!

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 42 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
[–] SwifferWetjet@thelemmy.club 30 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

To be 18 and not realize how fuckin raw that shit gets for everyone after about 45 minutes unless you reapply religiously like a goth at the beach 😂

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 17 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

Right?! Especially as a stoner lmao. My partner and I buy the big bottles of lube now, we ain't fuckin around. We are fucking around, though.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 10 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago)

Oh gods my ex would get such cotton crotch from weed my mouth would dry up going down on her

But yeah for insertion so long as you aren't using any silicone toys silicon lube is a fucking miracle substance

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 8 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, X-Lube?

The stuff is amazing, a bottle makes a ton, and as long as you use distilled water, a batch will keep for a long time.

[–] Holytimes@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 hours ago

Can I obtain a 55 gallon drum with single application pump attachment?

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[–] QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works 3 points 13 hours ago

Op im just glad you didn’t say this to the guy in picture

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 15 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

I didn't know there was a pill that turns your dick into Benjamin Netanyahu

[–] musubibreakfast@lemmy.world 13 points 18 hours ago

When I'm on Netanyahu pills I can only get off by shooting my load towards Palestine.

[–] redsand@infosec.pub 12 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

You know there's no way your mom doesn't already own a Sybian right? Condom makes cleanup easier. Seriously, try one while you can stay wet for hours.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 6 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Ew using one's parents' sex toys

[–] redsand@infosec.pub 4 points 16 hours ago

Read OP's other posts. If this is actually a swiss girl born in 08 they've 100% had access to a vibrator for a while. And even for rich kids a $2000 toy isn't something you can just order to the house.

[–] Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org 25 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago) (1 children)

To the tweet; Well, nothing isn't stopping you already.

It's not actually the penis itself that's doing the guiding. That thing is a separate function that can align up with the brain circuitry guiding it. It's the brain circuitry behind it that's making you do all those things. The penis not functioning doesn't remove the drive and that's why there are boner pills.

To OP: Though, sry to disappoint you and break the common misconception. Even with boner pills, guy needs to be turned on to get a boner. Boner pills wont give permanent boners out of thin air, those just make it easier to have a boner and maintain one.

Interesting tip, boner pills work systematically and give really nice gym pumps.

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 17 points 21 hours ago (3 children)
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[–] Wren@lemmy.today 8 points 17 hours ago

This sounds good in theory but in my experience recreation quickly becomes obligation.

Protip: women can take it too!

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 15 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (1 children)

I've taken the pills recreationally. Highly recommended when you expect your session to go for many hours, but you (the man) still have to be turned on. In other words, I a healthy male, did not get involuntarily erect by the pills.

EDIT: I hit puberty at 10yo. From 10 to about 19, my dick had a mind of its own. But since about that age, we have come to an agreement. Get hard and stay hard for as long as I ask, and I promise you'll never go hungry. The rest of the time, leave me the hell alone.

PS: It was miserable ~12.

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[–] Amnesigenic@lemmy.ml 15 points 21 hours ago

I felt this way about my sex drive until I transitioned, HRT killed the beast then brought it back perfected it like a gandalf the white

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