The dystopia is even more boring now because kids will have remote school instead of a snow day.

"now hurry up and get good grades so you can get a job and go to work"

Tbf the school probably doesn't care if you die either, the bus companies just fear the lawsuits.

"I can't come in, I've been shot in the head and I'm told I'll be dead soon."

"I feel like you aren't considering how this will impact the team."

That is such a ridiculous lie. Of course they care, do you know how much work it is to cover your shifts when you die all of a sudden without warning and sans the required approval for time off?

More sinister take:

"They'd caie if your death benefits them in some way".

Work cares! Just enough to throw a pizza party for your death.

Me: cheering in "home-office union agreement"

Sorry guys.

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