Well, for us it was a lot of introspection and surrounding ourselves with people who wouldn't be upset with us for being ourself. Also, hrt. HRT is magic (and I felt a lot better once I started injections rather than pills).

If you're allowing yourself to be yourself and not suppressing your emotions, then all you really need is time.

As for how to tell them apart, well, I am less jealous of others now that I like the way I look more, and if I want to dress or act a certain way I just do that. So i'm projecting onto others less, so I have less opportunities to get those feelings confused.