Because it's impossible for women to be flawed and abusive, and if there's an ugly person deliberately made uglier by colonizing aliens to dehumanize them that's obviously sexism?

There are plenty of great women characters in the book, you just decided women can never be the problem in a relationship without it being "problematic" and went downhill from there.

Hell, the most predatory voice in the first book is the male-voiced AI.

That all said, it is hard to tell where Dinniman stands exactly on the spectrum of "the overt sexualization of some of the women and men is specifically a commentary on the commercialization of the indigenous body by colonizing forces" and "that's a good excuse but he's also horny and trying to sell books."