What in the American yeehaw is this
this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2026
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Don't tell me you guys don't chase down your Big Az Burger over there without a 72oz Monster Dick Gulp.
You probably know it as the 212 centiliter Royale Gueule
Gas station food.
I used to work at a mail sorting facility, we had frozen sandwiches like this in the vending machines in the break room.
I have a specific fondness of the pre made baguettes jambon emmental they have at French has stations. They are not exceptional, but fulfill a certain void in me.
I somehow doubt American had station food will compare, though.
Eeh. It's the same kind of microwavable chow as they have in Japanese convenience stores - it's not good, but it's fine if you're expecting it.
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The US has a pretty broad range of what counts as a "gas station" Some of them have on-site prepared food that is legitimately pretty good.
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You're probably right, but we do have sushi at our gas stations.
I don't really recommend it.
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you can't tell me you don't have some terrible food in a gas/petrol station in your country. I've traveled. I've seen it.
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What beautiful horrors we have in store for you. Look on in terror and know that it’s already too late. The final choir has sung with abyssal chorus, signifying that the final gate has been opened and your doom is at hand. Now eat your vending machine cheeseburger
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Its crazy that this is the picture they chose to represent their product. That's as good as it gets.
"Aspect ratio for this photo ~~is~~ must be 4:3"
"You got it, boss"
"Carl's Jr. Extra Big-Ass Taco- now with more molecules
Carl's Jr. Fuck you, I'm eating."
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30 years ago when I was stuck working a crappy 3rd shift job, these were one of the few decent things to eat in the break room. I can still recall the taste but I can't say I miss it.
Bro, I kept some frozen burrito company in business because it was better than the drywall sandwiches they offered at camp. The burrito would thaw out in my work vest by lunch and was edible with a bit of hot sauce. Not good. Edible.
I still get one every few years, just to remember my roots.
Holy shit.
I've had one of these once.
... I recommend it to an adventurous eater, or someone who has depression.
Because you can eat one of these, and know with 100% confidence that this will be the worst hamburger you ever eat, and that everything else, everything after, is definitionally upward from there.
Truly these things are so awful they reset my entire scale for how awful food can taste.
I assume you must need to throw a bunch of ketchup and mustard too make this palatable? Reminds me of the cafeteria burgers we got in elementary school. Plain buns that have been under the heat lamp a bit too long.
our burgers in school were ok, even if they were part soy. this was the 70s and 80s though, before school lunches became outsourced profit centers for greedy corporations. school lunches in general were pretty good.. and at college after, even better. was like going to a gourmet all-you-can-eat buffet for every meal (the 'freshman 15' was very real back then).
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I'm not gonna sit here pretend like I haven't had these gas station microwave cheeseburgers before.
Yes it's probably been decades, but I can still remember eating these when I was in certain "situations" and there's a quality to them that isn't horrible, if you don't mind eating all the plastics and preservatives that come with it. There's something about the way the bread steams in the bag.
I do remember that you have got to make sure you microwave it thoroughly, and then you have got to let it cool a few minutes.
It's pretty hard to explain what "sad looking food" is in my language. I just show people American public school lunch.
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Is frozen food as bad everywhere as it is in the US?
It's the most nasty, chewy shit in the world here. I freeze home cooked meals and they reheat fine, so I don't get how 99%+ of our frozen food is so disgusting.
Look at the ingredients. A lot of these frozen burgers n shit have TVP, textured vegetable protein, to fill out the food instead of meat, pumped full of water so it freezes solid and thus steams TF out of it and becomes soggy, plus epic amounts of additives and preservatives. If all frozen foods were genuine home-cooked quality meals, they wouldn't last as long and would cost 10x as much so they can turn huge profit margins
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Never seen this one before, but my job had a few of these in the freezer vending machine. I actually thought they were decent, but everyone thought i was crazy lol. It was absolutely a passible meal for $2.50 at the time.
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The rule with these is to avoid throwing the bread in the microwave and toast it instead. It's actually not bad.
To clarify: it's not bad considering the extremely low bar.
I decided to not become a pornstar 😭. I could have been there getting it on with the most beautiful women in the world. But I don't know if y'all noticed, they only got two! Every sex porn guy only has two balls! What do they do to their third ball!!!!
What are these? Is this a 7-11 special?
From what I remember, 7-Eleven considers itself too special to carry these. When I've seen them, they've always been in, like, weird off-brand truck stops and gas stations that aren't part of a chain.
Break room vending machine at one of the more upscale tire factories.
Also in the lobby of the engineering building at my college. Perfect food for panicking undergrads working on projects until 2am the night before they're due.
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A friend of mine once had me pose with two of these when on a roadtrip (we had never seen them before).
So he could say I had "azburgers"
Damn forgot about cheap vending machine burgers. Moved out when I was 17, my roommate's mom worked for a company "Canteen" that restocked something like these into vending machines, so we got a lot for free every week.
Ate a whole bunch in the first year. Eventually got really sick of them. Very believable you could grow a third ball from the preservatives. I'll probably get some kind of cancer instead.
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Is this a frozen product, or is it wrapped at room temperature like a Joe Louis cake? What in tarnation am I even looking at?
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i wonder how often the ceo and board members of companies like conagra 'eat their own dog food'.
just a hunch, but i'm guessing that's never.
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