I have a toaster that is smart enough to perfectly toast any bread you can fit into it, regardless of density, thickness or even if it's frozen, and it's from the 1950s.

Yes, that one.

It is a premium quality show, after all.

I think in most cases it's added functionality and convenience at the cost of privacy, sure the scale is still gonna tell you how much you weigh, but what if it automatically saved that to an app so you can track your weight loss progress without writing it down manually (as long as you're OK with some company also having that info so they can share ads with you for weight loss products to help you reach that goal faster without allowing you to build the habits to do it right.

Isn't it nice that you can just ask your fridge if there's milk in it while you're at the store rather than hoping you have milk, or assuming you dont? Disregard the fact that Samsung is using that fridge to know whether or not you're home right now, if you have an iPhone, or what kind of smart TV you have. It's still a fridge, it still keeps things cool, until a firmware update breaks that of course, guess you just need to buy a new fridge, it's been a couple years anyway.

Sometimes (though not often) the smart appliance is cheaper since they know they're gonna make money on the data.

Going to be? The vast majority of appliances are still sold without this nonsense.

for about two years since they were sold

I've seen a few espresso maker models on James Hoffman's channel that allow users/roasters to share brewing profiles online. Not that the feature requires internet, but it does make it easier.

The built in computer is mining bitcoins and the generated heat is used for boiling the water.

You mean you dont need your machine to tell some ad brokers to contact you about needing to buy more coffee soon?

I guess some kind of home automation setup could start coffee brewing when you wake up or just before you get home.

It does seem like a pretty marginal benefit.

That being said, I have a hard time understanding why so many people own other IoT things, say, smart speakers. Like, I just don't see the problem that they're solving.

Or vibecoded firmware that is sending every piece of telemetry Claude decided it needed to some hard coded local ip address and NO HUMAN has ever looked at the code or the network traffic.

So probably pinging the entire network with discovery packets multiple times per second and doing nothing with the result.

Certain things being remotely controllable is great. Garage door opener, thermostat, some lights, doorbell camera.

Fridge, toaster, coffee maker, washer/dryer? Completely pointless.

I don't want a smart TV, but there's only a couple non-smart brands left, and neither of them seem to have the best quality product on the market.

While the consumer carries blame, more of it goes to these data mining companies

An aeropress and electric kettle is the way to go, quick and super easy to press out the grind, then a quick rinse and you're done cleaning

I can feel the coffee snobs crying out in pain from here