Ask Lemmy

The #1 sign of adulting has to be paying for your own stuff.

Celebrities (especially politicians) younger than me existing.

When you stop caring if something is a childish thing or not. Some people never get there.

You start saving boxes. You think, this looks like a good box.

Taking responsibility for your own actions.

Not just mistakes, but being proactive about positive things without needing to be prompted.

You empty the dishwasher immediately, as it is the only time during the day you have the time to do it.

You wash your sheets, because of the calendar notification popping up.

you vacuum the flat on saturday at 8 AM, as that is the time to vacuum the flat in your planner.

You get excited about a pillow

Waking up at 7 on a Saturday for no fucking reason

Realizing capitalism sorta sucks

When your empathy extends to people you don't even like.

Getting a new kitchen appliance is exciting. I was so amazed when I first got an air fryer. Also, getting socks as a gift is pretty good.

I was in my late 20s and two of my uncle was having a heated argument over politics. Everyone else was quiet, afraid to say anything. I spoke out in a normal tone, not raising my voice, "that's enough". They stopped immediately. It was fairly surreal.

One big sign is when you stop demanding to be treated like an adult and just start being one.

Being an adult is just a decision you make one day.

Years ago my older brother was on the phone complaining to me because our mom found out he bought a motorcycle and was mad at him and my dad (who helped him pick it out).

He wanted to know why my mom thought she could treat him like a child.

I pointed out that when he decided to get a motorcycle and kept it secret from our mom, he was acting like a child and enabling her to treat him like one.

I have no interest in ever owning a motorcycle. However, if I ever did, it would never occur to me to keep it secret from anybody, because I'm an adult in charge of my own life. Everyone else can have opinions, but I get to decide whose opinions matter to me.

You find yourself in a hardware or furniture store and everything looks cool.

I posted a gif of Ray Liotta laughing in Goodfellas a few days ago. Someone replied telling me the gif was perfect, and asking what was it from?

When you see your parents as people and stop blaming them for everything.

When throwing away a perfectly good box is a well thought out decision after the box has been in a staging area for some time while you think about it.

Having the opportunity to buy cake whenever you want, having enough money to buy cake whenever you want, and choosing to not buy cake whenever you want.

Sounds mundane but a few days ago, for the first time I bought myself a jacket. I am 28. My grandma loves to gift clothes for christmas especially stuff like jackets, so I didn't really need to buy one until now. On the way back from the shop I felt weirdly adult. I bought most of my other clothes myself for around 10 years, but never a jacket

basically means you can watch adult movies and commit this thing called adultery. ezpz.

kidding aside, i think a good sign for me is following through with my decisions, and, if i decided not to, acknowledge my mistake and learn from it.

Being around kids and being seen just like I remember seeing adults when I was little. Assumed authority and decision making power and the answer to every problem or wish.

You find yourself compulsively drawn to woodworking.

Starting to remember the good reasons why you DIDN'T like something in the past and trusting your past judgment.

Being jealous of other people's wooden floors

Finding joy in having a clean kitchen

Buying and cooking your own food. Reading the nutritional info on labels.

You wash all your dinner dishes before you go to bed.

You start to wonder, “when am I going to feel like an adult?”

When I got a well-paying job, earning me about 10 times as much as I did while working as a teaching assistant at uni. I realized I could afford more than renting a student apartment and cheap food. Buying furniture, an apartment, having kids, tech toys. A car.

Makes me feel independent and in control of my life, I guess.

When I truly internalized that I don't have to prove my worth to anyone, even if I don't always know what I'm doing.

Looking back, that sense of self-worth and confidence is what I probably saw in all of the adults around me that made them seem so incredible as a child.

So when I felt that, I thought "huh, so this is what being an adult feels like."

I got towels, cast iron pans, and a new knife for Christmas and couldn't have been happier.

I'm still a bed by the wall person though. when me and my partner get a house that will probably change, but for now I like having a corner to sit up against.

Your body starts betraying you.

More specific to becoming a middle aged man, I started finding any sport enjoyable regardless of what it was. Additionally I started listening to history podcasts. Not sure these are gendered activities but there is definitely a stereotype that men start getting more involved in sport and history.