this post was submitted on 10 May 2025
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Comic Strips

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[–] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 37 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You gotta get that human a second human, they're so much easier to take care of when there's two of them! Make sure they're neutered though, don't want to take care of a litter!

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 18 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Also, don't mind the constant humping

[–] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Only if both humans consent! Otherwise you might need to separate them or keep a spray bottle handy to stop the behavior!

[–] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

How would you know? It’s not like their thinking units have inter-robot wireless link modules. They just make cute sounds with their ingest cloacae. We really need to stop robotomorphising the humans, acting like they’re capable of such abstract concepts, and imposing our advanced moral systems on them. They have non-consensual interactions all the time, it’s in their nature.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 116 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"Its shitposting all over the carpet. And you think thats cute?"

[–] toy_boat_toy_boat@lemmy.world 28 points 1 day ago

now it's reposting it all over the place. honey, i think we should call the vet.

[–] ThunderLegend@sh.itjust.works 38 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Sometimes I get sad I have no one with this kind of humor and the language skills to share memes like this with.

[–] shplane@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

You can send them to me. I love this kinda stuff.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 79 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I would totally be happy being a robot's pet. I bet they'd give me a great gaming PC if I promised not to pee on the sofa.

[–] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 76 points 1 day ago

Nah, my luck I end up adopted by some redneck robot, like the ones that build trucks or something, and I have to live chained to a tree, sleeping in an old tractor tire.

[–] dumbass@leminal.space 49 points 1 day ago (1 children)

if I promised not to pee on the sofa.

There's always some over the top requirements!

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 17 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Well there are other ways to mark my territory, to be fair.

[–] pticrix@lemmy.ca 12 points 1 day ago

We didn't invent Cheetos stains for nothing. It's a strong marker.

[–] dumbass@leminal.space 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Slovene@feddit.nl 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Or more fun ways. Like cumming on the sofa.

[–] SolarMonkey@slrpnk.net 9 points 1 day ago

Found JD Vance’s Lemmy account!

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] AngrySquirrel@lemm.ee 3 points 1 day ago

Where do I sign up?

[–] pruwybn@discuss.tchncs.de 18 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] austinfloyd@ttrpg.network 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm hoping this is partly a Porno for Pyros reference.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 12 points 1 day ago

A human on a leash walks past another human on a leash. They lock eyes on their t-shirts.

"Team Jacob sucks!"
"No, Team Edward sucks harder!"
"Jacob sucks the most!"
"Edward was sucking before Jacob was even born!"
"Jacob sucks more in a single year than Edward sucks in several extended lifetimes!"
"Edward sucks full time though, whereas Jacob only sucks part-time!"
... etc

[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago (2 children)

My bots always try to get me to buy micro transactions and toxic radioactive herbal medicine from China.

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 8 points 1 day ago

I have started actively refusing games with microtransactions and it's great

[–] Droechai@lemm.ee 1 points 1 day ago

But that black salve seems so efficient in removing blemishes (by dissolving the top skin layers)

[–] match@pawb.social 9 points 1 day ago

I'm gonna get an upvote cat toy and wave it at the puppygirls

[–] RedStrider@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

moby from brainpop if he didn't have paint