instantly renaming a large city
this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2025
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Asklemmy
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But you have to name it after the person you hate the most.
Can communicate with any animal
But they can't communicate with you
Haha imagine trying to explain that to people.
"I have a superpower, I can speak to animals they just can't speak back"
"But everyone has that superpower, I can do that too"
"Yeh but I'm actually really talking to them, like in their language that they can understand"
"How do you know?"
"..."
I mean, you can ask an animal to do some arbitrary action specified by the other person, and then the animal (hopefully) does it. This side effect isn't great, but it definitely still leaves some real usefulness.
Telling my dog as I go to the garage, "I'll be back in literally one minute." and being understood would rock.
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Oh damn. You got me bad on that one.
Fall asleep at any time and place by will
It is impossible to wake up until you are fully rested, including by alarm, fire, or intruder.
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I'll stick with the strongest superpower of them all, I am Cables Never Tangle Man!
But you cannot tie knots anymore. Even worse - every knot you touch magically slips open. Be careful not to trip over your shoelaces!
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True Omnipotence
(Also read/listen to Worm
But of an unrelated universe...so schizophrenia with delusions of grandure lol
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Being able to hear from afar
But only bad music.
I guess I choose Denmark or maybe Portugal. Having USA and Russia being superpowers has been real shit.
Ability to control every atom in the surrounding area of approx 1 km.
I can teleport instantly to any location I have previously visited.
But each location has a specific song you must play on an Ocarina....
Do I know the song automatically? Or like, do I have to defeat someone in single combat to get to learn the song?
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Super strength
The power to reply to my own comment.
but you have multiple personality disorder
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