Why would god use dumbasses as the standard unit of philosophy?
this post was submitted on 03 Apr 2026
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It's measuring speed, speed of light is 1 dumbass.
Which proves God is American (anything except metric)
I learned recently that it was the Babylonians who invented the hour and the minute as a unit of time, and they used base 60, which I thought was pretty neat. Then we created seconds and milliseconds in base 10.
IIRC, they picked 60 because it could be evenly divided into 1/2, 1/3, 1/4, 1/5, and 1/6 which allowed them to stick to whole numbers more easily.
If you use your thumb to count the sections of 4 fingers you get 12.
Then you hold up a finger on your other hand. When all 5 are up you have 60.
I have never accepted this explanation. Yes, using base 12 is logical and well documented. But that means you've got 12 on the other hand as well. 144 would've made more sense.
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Oh, I thought OOP just forgot to place a comma:
"First of all, the speed of light is 1, dumbass."
Stubborn as a mule is mentioned in Psalms and Proverbs, so there is precedent.
'Cause there's so many of them. It's like using fruit flies for biological research.
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Because we tried to make the meter one 40-millionth of the earths circumference, failed, and ended up at a 299792458th of the distance light travels in a 60th of a 60th of a 24th of the time earth doesn't take to make a full rotation.
This one's on us
Having said that, we're pretty lucky that using those pretty arbitrary values we ended up with a speed that you can approximate as 300 million m/s and be off by less than 0.1%.
My understanding is that the person proposing the meter's distance immediately caught their mistake but didn't bring it up because they didn't want people to think the system was flawed, not so much that the measurement was off.
At least one second has a simple origin, and totally wasn't back-defined in 1967
oh wait
The current and formal definition in the International System of Units (SI) is more precise:
The second [...] is defined by taking the fixed numerical value of the caesium (Cs) frequency, ΔνCs, the unperturbed ground-state hyperfine transition frequency of the Cs-133 atom, to be 9192631770 when expressed in the unit hertz, which is equal to s−1.[1]
How fast is a dumbass?
Not as fast as 2 dumbass
How fast can you throw?
1c
1 dumbass per... hour? Minute? Second? 🤷♂️
It's already the right unit. Like a watt is a joule/s
That /s had me looking for the joke for like 10 seconds
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The speed of light is a tautology. We define it via how many meters light travels in a second. And we define the meter by the same measure. It’s just the distance light travels in 1⁄299792458 Of a second.
c is a measurable constant, not some unit that is arbitrarily defined. Like Boltzmann's Constant, or the ground state hyperfine transition frequency of the Cesium-133 atom... it just... Is.
Therefore, it is a useful tool to define units. You claim it is a tautology because we write it in units of meters per second, while the meter is defined based on c. This is easily disproven, as you can represent the speed of light in any unit of velocity. It is a fundamental constant, derivable through experiment without any units a priori.
Ergo, it is 1
1 c, yeah.
dumbass
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The first rule of tautology club is the first rule of tautology club lol
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a second is defined as the time it takes for a caesium atom to oscillate exactly 9192631770 times, at least according to the SI. a meter is then defined, as you said, as the distance light travels in 1/299792458 seconds, which corresponds to some large number of oscillations of those caesium atoms. these numbers are pretty much arbitrary though, we just picked them to match our previous, less precise, definitions of meters and seconds. but using oscillations of caesium atoms and speeds of light in your is completely equivalent to using meters and seconds, except that the latter units are more familiar to us
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Universal refresh rate.
The human eye can’t see over 1.
It's deeper than that as we have instruments to measure things we can't personally perceive.
From everything we know it's quite literally the limit the universe can update. For the photon moving at light speed time quite literally doesn't exist. When you look up at the stars, for the photons hitting your eye balls their experience is that creation to reception is instantaneous. The millions or billions of years we perceive it traveled doesn't exist at that speed.
I just think that's neat.
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For the simulation.
A mile is 0.000000000000**1701** light years. How d'you like them Kaferian apples?
The name's, Dumas.
I'm a dumbass? I'm not the one deciding all speed should be scaled to a fraction of the fastest thing that exists, dipshit.
I mean, it's better than trying to scale it to a fraction of the slowest thing that exists...
Jot that down.
I didn't know a dumbass was a unit of velocity...
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