If you find yourself unable to read the source material, instead of giving up try engaging with more modern versions of the source material. There was a post on here by Feed_el_Castro who said

An unfortunate problem with Marxism is that for some reason we expect people to read the original works of the 1800s. We don’t expect this for any other science.

The way we learn physics is not by reading Dirac’s and Newtons and Einstiens theories as they wrote them, but through a systemized breakdown of the cirriculum developed over a century of increasing knowledge in the topic, in which you start with simplified building blocks which you can use to learn the more difficult parts. We also make an effort in designing physics problems which require a certain level of repitition to master and understand.

He then lists comrade Luna Oi's English translations of the Marxist cirriculum in Vietnam. Which I would also recommend

Nice comrade. After a while, it'll seem like everything that isn't communist theory is just media with the volume turned down. Or like trying to listen to boring elevator soft jazz after having listened to progressive heavy metal or something.

I can't imagine going back to watching youtube video essays after having read Losurdo or Rodney.

I like to listen to an audio book while playing a relatively brain free video game and then listen to it again while reading along later. The first pass is just to get my brain used to the general concepts, vocabulary and writing style and the second pass gets the ideas really locked down.

Happy for you and proud of you for keeping after it. Audiobooks are a great option!

What are you enjoying now?

Just remember that reading is like a muscle. The more you practice it, it increases your stamina and ability to do harder reading.