CEO Dana White has long been an ally of President Donald Trump and his administration. Agents would be trained in hand-to-hand combat.

The FBI plans to offer the Ultimate Fighting Championship an exclusive one-year contract to train its special agents in hand-to-hand combat, according to a document released by the agency in September.

The UFC, according to the bureau, is “the sole qualified vendor” capable of providing tactical training that meets FBI standards. The justification for the contract cited the “expertise” the multibillion-dollar global media business has in mixed martial arts, striking techniques, grappling and takedowns.

The bureau said that market research determined that “no other vendor can provide comprehensive training encompassing all required skills at the necessary expertise level within the required timeframe.”

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[–] 91 points 6 days ago (16 children)

Shit like this shows that it's not just Trump that's the problem, but that the MAGA movement as a whole is based on grift and political favoritism at the expense of competent governance.

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  • [–] 16 points 6 days ago (5 children)

    No kidding?

    I am sarcastic because the situation has been clear for 30 years at a minimum.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 days ago (4 children)
  • [–] 3 points 6 days ago (3 children)

    You are welcome. You say that, but almost nobody gets it still. Even on lemmy here. We are so fucked.

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  • [–] 7 points 6 days ago (2 children)

    I was agreeing with you, and calling OP Captain Obvious. Sorry, should have been clearer.

    You're right. The Zombie Apocalypse hit the world hard in the 80s. Most of the zombies don't know they're zombies. Some of us do and are flabbergasted others can't see it.

    I'm tired of being a zombie. Time to eat some brains, no?

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  • [–] 7 points 6 days ago (8 children)

    America is the problem. The whole country allowed (and is still allowing) this to happen.

    MAGA isn't the hero America needed, but it's the one they deserve.

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  • [–] 9 points 6 days ago (2 children)

    The analogy isn't quite right, but I know you wanted to use the quote.

    MAGA is Joker, and the US doesn't have a Batman anywhere, maybe a few Gordons but they don't have enough power to do much. Although as all analogies do, this breaks because MAGA leaders would never burn their half of the money for a message. They want every dime for themselves.

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  • [–] -3 points 6 days ago* (2 children)

    It scares me that Americans want to go back to life before trump, that should t be the goal. As an American it looks like the left just wants to be able to live in earned privileges again.

    "Ignorance is bliss" IS their culture.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    Life before Trump is exactly what led to having Trump.

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  • [–] 3 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

    Exactly!!! It's like the culture is the virus but no one wants to admit it or is even capable of understanding because the culture dominantly focused of escapism and distraction from reality.

    Just as an example... People don't even understand their individuality was marketed in order consolidate them into demographics that are more easily controlled. And that's was in the analogs days.

    Now we have automated ai profiling and exact psychological pin-pointed specific marketing to each individual that is able lead them on whatever path is needed. ...But for some reason that's not the thing people are talking about, instead they talk about the marketed topics of Ai slop, and looping recycled drama of consumer ai.

    People think they are fighting the power or fighting for progression and freedom, but they are just acting out preconceived paths that are marketed to them and funded by the same people they claim to protest.

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  • [+] -6 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    But if people would just vote differently and stop doing purity tests then the system would fix itself /copium

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  • [–] 4 points 6 days ago

    I mean little improvements at least. Vote for a candidate you can agree with on some and then keep moving the needle in that direction. But it doesn't seem to happen in America and times are getting hard so people are shifting to the right.

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  • [–] 32 points 6 days ago (5 children)

    The most ridiculous administration.

    Donnie and pals are easily some of the stupidest people we could have found for the job.

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  • [–] 18 points 6 days ago (3 children)

    It’s all a grift. This is just another way to funnel government money to his pals and supporters.

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  • [–] 2 points 6 days ago (2 children)

    It really is that, because all the UFC does is host the fight and pay the competitors. They don’t actually train fighters. At most they introduce them to coaches.

    All the training is done by people paid by the fighter in preparation for the match. If the FBi wanted to, they could interview that network of fighters and coaches, look into giving their agents mma training, etc.

    Besides that, I feel that mma requires years of training and have no idea how much time the bureau spends on hand to hand combat training. My personal take is that mma can harm your body, brain, and mind and you’re better off doing firearms training if you want to be able to protect yourself.

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  • [–] 1 point 5 days ago

    I guess a fair amount of agents would blow their cover if they carry firearms.

    Infiltration is entirely a psychological game, but it adds a sense of safety/calmness to be properly trained in close quarters combat. If time is a constraint, then focusing efforts on one technique is worth more than dabbling in everything

    So it's not necessarily because they're intended to use it, but I believe infiltration tasks becomes easier if you think you're the strongest fighter in the room

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  • [–] 28 points 6 days ago

    It's hard to make this government more laughable every day, but they live for the challenge.

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  • [–] 22 points 6 days ago

    Every time I think Republican performative machismo can't get any more ridiculous, they go and prove me wrong.

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  • [–] 16 points 6 days ago (2 children)

    The UFC doesn't train the fighters. WTF.

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  • [–] 12 points 6 days ago

    Between this and Hegseth wanting to live broadcast executions, I’m exceedingly confident we’ll see real televised “Running Man” within ten years.

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  • [–] 11 points 6 days ago (2 children)

    These people are fucking stupid.

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  • [–] 7 points 5 days ago (2 children)

    What the fuck is the matter with these fuckers? Brain damage? Just plain stupid? What?

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  • [–] 4 points 5 days ago* (1 child)

    Ass lickers. They think that demeaning themselves in front of trump will lead to special favours and wealth by association. They're mistaken, of course.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 day ago

    There are many ardent butthole suckers in trump immediate field of play. As a mob boss he surrounds himself with lieutenants, all fawning for illegal gains and "power".

    Trump wants to be the mob boss of the western hemisphere. Emperor Donny. All kings and presidents and autocrats and dictators have one thing in common - keeping power by the sword. Money means nothing without the power to keep it - as musk found out when king donnie explained the facts of life to him - the mob facts of life - because trump has wanted to be a "boss" the whole time he laundered money for the mobs but they kept him "clean" - for as long as they could - which turned out to be a long time and STILL happening. Once the traitor got control of the military and the police and the courts - look out. The criminals are in charge of the good guys (us - the peon citizens).

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  • [–] 8 points 6 days ago
    [–] 8 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    I'd like to see how fast a well-trained and fit FBI agent would have a UFC fighter tapping out.

    Keep in mind, the FBI doesn't generally get the fatass Meal Team Six LEO members that regular law enforcement hires.

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  • [–] 4 points 6 days ago

    Idk about whom to root for in that situation. The FBI, while now somewhat professional, are not the good guys, and they never have been, not entirely.

    I like taking down organized crime, but they won't be doing that now. Plus they have a shitload of mormons.

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  • [–] 7 points 6 days ago

    Weird so now FBI agents are going to gently cuddle the criminals until they tap out?

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  • [–] 6 points 6 days ago

    The gravy seals wouldn't last 10 seconds grappling a stuffed animal.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 days ago

    Kash is a Zika baby.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 days ago

    Idiocracy, except run by the most malicious, dumb, and lead deficient assholes on the planet.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 days ago

    So we can sue Dana white if they kill someone trying to choke them out?

    His company trains them, an incoming rational administration can hold him liable for what I'm sure is gonna be bullshit.

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  • [–] 4 points 6 days ago (2 children)

    The stupidity of this aside, this isn't the weirdest thing historically. Like boxers were often brought in to train soldiers in hand to hand combat for example. But the fact its UFC in particular is kinda the problem here, it'd be less notable if it was just mixed martial artists being brought.

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  • [–] 3 points 6 days ago (1 child)

    Literally why the fuck are FBI and UFC in the same sentence?

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  • [–] 1 point 5 days ago

    And who does provide the clown shoes for this circus?

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