A lady at the apple orchard disco the other night asked if I was born a man or a woman and I, drunk, beckoned her close to whisper and then hollered I WAS BORN A BABY into her ear

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[–] 78 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Regarding the title: I once made an "ACAB - Assigned Cute At Birth" t-shirt in non-binary pride colors for a friend of mine. Kind of reminded me of that.

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  • [–] 48 points 1 year ago (15 children)

    My wife's little brother who is disabled thought our baby would be 3 months old when born.

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  • [–] 91 points 1 year ago (13 children)

    That's dumb, the baby is obviously ~9 months old when born.

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  • [–] 17 points 1 year ago (8 children)

    Isn't this legitimately how Koreans count their age? Like, I think you pop out as a 1 year old according to their age system.

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  • [–] 36 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    From what I understand, they've been using the 'normal' system for most legal things since the 60s, and that was just how they socially talked about age, until it was abandoned in 2023.

    The old system also added a year on New years, not on your birthday. Meaning a baby born 2 days ago would be 2 years old if they were born on December 31. Apparently, laws do still keep that standard for some age based regulations, like school, drinking age, voting age, and draft. Which kind of makes sense; everyone born in X year gains those things at the same time. A less arbitrary cut off date for schools, no awkward math whe checking IDs, just born in '04, you're good.'

    Still seems confusing having 3 ages in different contexts though.

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    Fun fact: up until fairly recently, babies weren't often named until at least their second birthday. Hence, headstones with "baby", "junior", etc. littering pioneer graveyards and similar.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    That kinda makes sense. Giving a name before knowing how the childs behaviour, temperament or similar is rather unintuitive. Also probably makes the loss a bit less hard if the child dies before it's at least a year old, which is probably the root cause for that costume.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 child)

    It was also counted from the beginning of the year https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/East_Asian_age_reckoning but they oficially switched in 2023

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  • [–] 11 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    This has always bothered me about the bullshit pro-life argument. If life starts at conception, then clearly we're making people wait an additional 9 months to vote.

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  • [–] 11 points 1 year ago

    There is actually one problem with counting age from birth: premature babies are behind on everything! Of course we could correct that by saying that they were minus three months old when born (or however early they are).

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  • [–] 48 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    I need to know more about this apple orchard disco.

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  • [–] 39 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    I was brought into this world a weak flesh thing. Once I understood that weakness it disgusted me. I aspired to the strength of steel. I craved the blessed purity of the machine...

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  • [–] 32 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    What is an "Apple Orchard Disco"?

    And, if someone would ask me such a question, I'd turn around immediately, even though I'm personally far from all this LGBTQ stuff.

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  • [–] 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    Might be a disco that takes place in a literal orchard. People on the countryside get creative...

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    i live just on the edge of a city. one of our favorite local bars/concert venues is in a something orchard. i don't know trees.

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Goddamn Warren Ellis. You had one job.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago

    "Oh honey, I wasn't born at all"

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago

    Nice to see a Bethany Black joke in here, thanks! <3

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