this post was submitted on 13 Apr 2025
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politics

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[–] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 150 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)
[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 39 points 3 weeks ago

With all due happy respect, fuck you, I came to say exactly that!

[–] Ledericas@lemm.ee 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

overweight centaur you mean.

[–] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 3 weeks ago

Looking at a picture elsewhere in the thread, you might be right, he's the front half of a centaur.

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[–] Rivalarrival@lemmy.today 126 points 3 weeks ago

I want to hear this from the coroner, not his physician.

[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 82 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)
[–] El_Scapacabra@lemm.ee 45 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

He's such a compulsive criminal that he even defies the laws of physics.

[–] HK65@sopuli.xyz 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

He's obviously on high heels.

[–] sporkler@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago

I wonder if that would show up on a urinalysis?

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 7 points 3 weeks ago

This picture burgles gravity!

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

Hey, "round" is a shape! 😃

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[–] Geetnerd@lemmy.world 70 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

"For an 80 year old fat fuck that's never exerted himself beyond a brisk walk, he's good."

[–] Ledericas@lemm.ee 18 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

hes being held in place by a girlde

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[–] astronaut_sloth@mander.xyz 56 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Honestly, of all the things he's doing, not releasing the results of his physical are the least worrisome. Anyone with eyes and a brain can see he's not healthy.

[–] Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago

At least it's better than his last term, where his personal doctor said he was the healthiest person ever (using language that clearly came from Trump himself) and the medical records were confiscated by his bodyguard.

Kind of like how he sued his old college to prevent them from sharing his grades - those are definitely the actions of someone who has nothing to hide.

[–] Red_October@lemmy.world 35 points 3 weeks ago

Well he's alive enough to continue actively fucking up our country, so that right there deserves a national day of mourning.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 33 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I didn't realize that "amorphous blob" was even a shape.

[–] KingGordon@lemmy.world 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Well, a steaming pile of shit is a shape.

[–] klemptor@startrek.website 4 points 3 weeks ago

He's a 7 on the Bristol scale.

[–] Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de 24 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)
[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

With him, any cancer would be ass cancer.

[–] BrianTheeBiscuiteer@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

But can ass cancer contract ass cancer?

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[–] jaggedrobotpubes@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Don't root for donald trump.

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[–] D_C@lemm.ee 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

There's a dead badger up the road that's in better shape than this idiotic ArseNugget.

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[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Shit man. There you go, getting my hopes up

[–] samuelazers@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah, not super healthy to harbor these kind of hopes. Good people leave too soon, and the people you dislike, seem to linger in for too long, defying your death wishes.

[–] pozzy77@lemmy.world 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Hopefully Trump ends his time with months of nonstop flatulence and explosive diarrhea

[–] oozynozh@lemm.ee 7 points 3 weeks ago

that's been an ongoing thing so the end will probably be a continuation of the same

[–] thisphuckinguy@lemmy.world 21 points 3 weeks ago

The shape of a gummy bear

[–] aesthelete@lemmy.world 20 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Give them time they have to run it through the A1 first.

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[–] WaxiestSteam69@lemmy.world 19 points 3 weeks ago

I doubt any published info will reflect reality.

[–] BigMikeInAustin@lemmy.world 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Supposedly it's not manly to be able to lift your short fingers above the height of where your heart is supposed to be. Also, it's emasculating to be seen with your wife these days, apparently.

[–] smeenz@lemmy.nz 4 points 3 weeks ago

She's busy complying as little as possible with their prenup conditions

[–] adarza@lemmy.ca 15 points 3 weeks ago

results of his physical aren't immediately released

they have to be shredded and replaced with fiction.

[–] MeekerThanBeaker@lemmy.world 15 points 3 weeks ago

That's an awfully big umbrella you got there. What are you, scared of a little water? You might melt?

[–] Ledericas@lemm.ee 15 points 3 weeks ago

it usually means, he has high cholesterol, high triglycerides, blood pressure, high blood sugar or close to it.

[–] Audacious@sh.itjust.works 14 points 3 weeks ago

Still waiting for the medical records he promised before the election...

[–] DirtPuddleMisfortune@feddit.org 13 points 3 weeks ago

They are probably audited, like his taxes.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 11 points 3 weeks ago

He's the healthiest man in the world, just like when this came up six years ago or whenever that was.

[–] Phoenicianpirate@lemm.ee 10 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I love on they demanded Obama's birth certificate, but he refused to show his financial documents (even though every president has done so) and is keeping a fuckload of very important information that the people needs to know secret.

[–] prototypez9er@lemmynsfw.com 8 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

More taxpayer-funded McDonald's orders please.

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[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago

Covfefe for everybody!

[–] Whirlygirl9@kbin.melroy.org 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

The Simpsons have failed us. The prediction of the 12th of April has not come to pass.

[–] celeryfc@lemm.ee 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

The Simpson’s didn’t let us down, the internet did. Snopes

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[–] pyre@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

it's like he doesn't know what the words "good" or "shape" mean.

The only good shape he can be in is when somebody carves him out with slowly with a butter knife

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